on her there
Girl in Russia and Ukraine
Sorry, This is a special page. Please find your Girl and Useful information about her click on the link above.
Never do fall a victim of a crime. Always report scammers to AllRussian or AllSiberian authorities. Just doreport scams. Yes, they probably don't know what's going on. But without actual victims reports they are not going to do anything, besides if men don't report girl they will not have much info to work with! Do the important thing to keep in mind. Just don't expect them to rush and arrest girl right after your report. Her backgrounds will be that last sign that will brake the scammer back.
Being Russian girls I know many cases when Russian authorities for a long time were closing eyes on many disgusting things going on in Russia, like underground telephone stations, or murders of the foreign students, etc.. But after the international scandals and under some pressure from the "top" they finally started investigations and actually prosecuted the criminals.receive on scams. It is always current and up to date. It is fully applicable to any your situation that fits the description It's wrong. It is like reading a medical book - it seems you have symptoms of all deceases and are about to die tomorrow. The goal of this e-book is to show you the ways of finding out if your correspondent is honest and prompt you to do that from the very beginning of your relationship
Keep in touch with the people who matter most. Search, find, and reunite with people you’ve lost track of. Share stories, news, and photos to stay connected with them. Join more than million members! Our mission is to help friends, family, classmates, and coworkers reconnect and keep connected…all for free! These people are She does not have any doubts about her love to you. She wants to come and visit you in your country; she says she cannot wait to see you, she cannot live without you; often this will be written in all capital letters and with many exclamation marks. She wants you to send her money for visa and/or tickets and/or insurance and /or "pocket money" to show to customs (to prove she is not going to start illegally working while in your country and can support herself during her stay). She does not want you to visit her, even if you express such a desire, she only wants the money to be sent by a wire transfer (Western Union or Money Gram), she does not want you to send her air ticket saying that this should be only purchased through the agency she is working her visa through. She has a way of getting a guaranteed visitor's visa to the countries such as the USA, Canada, Australia and European Union. Often scammers say they have already invested their own money in the visa process, or that they will pay the most part of the ticket/visa/insurance fees, you only need to send a part of the money. The source of the money may be selling sentimental articles, parents give her money they saved for her wedding eerywhere, and tell everybody: "the registrations from Russia are not allowed". But the most important thing you should remember: if registrations from Russia are not allowed, the real Russian girl will NOT try to sneak in anyway and lie in her profile. For example, i do
f it is a UK site forsome people only, the real Russian girsl will just turn around and go. She will never lie that she is from UK and register by all means. There are plenty of places where real Russian people are welcomed and can register. Only scammers try to sneak in everywhere, even when the door is closed in front of their nose, they don't care, and mass-mail, hoping to catch their gullible fish! The bottom line: if a Russian girl puts in her profile that she is from US or UK, this is a 100% scam. ESPECIALLY on the sites they are not allowed! Tip 5. Another indication of scam is mass-mailing everybody on the site. With all my experience tc, etc - this all is only said to make you feel guilty if you do not send the rest of the money. In some cases, you will be sent a voice file with the email, where she does not call you on the name but says how much she loves you and wants to be with you. In some cases, you can be presented with a fake copy of the visa, itinerary of her flight, scanned copies of documents etc, etc - which seem to be legitimate. (Confirming the legitimacy of girl do it such a document is as easy as contacting the authority that supposedly issued it - i.e. the Embassy of your country.) In some cases, the scammer calls you on the phone, usually it will be at night and the call will be under 1 minute long (because it is "too expensive" for her) but "she wanted to hear your voice"; other cases may be where a scammer calls crying to announce a sudden urgent money request from authorities (insurance, pocket money, customs etc). ALL THOSE SIGNS INDICATE SCAM ! ! !
they are also involved in identity thefts, backgrounds, forging documents, passwords cracking, braking into the online databases with confidential info, stealing credit cards and paypal accounts, making purchases with stolen credit cards online Under circumstances you should be sorry for her. And you should be embarrassed to report them. Please remember: YOU didn't do anything wrong or embarrassing,
r mass-mailing programs (those are usually used to send spam). In particular: FC'2000, Becky and CommuniGate Pro. Now, depending on the mail service, IPs may be in the different locations other than shown, and you may not be able to tell right away which one is actually the IP of the scammer's computer. That's why it is a good idea to check ALL IPs found in the headers. You may want to skip the first IP though, as it will probably be your own mailserver. To check IPs, go here: http://www.dnsstuff.com/ and enter it in the box that says "IPWHOIS Lookup" In the results, look at the lines that say intenum: netname: descr: If the results say Rambler.ru, Yandex.ru, List.ru, newmail.ru, pochta.ru, etc.., skip those. Remember: those are IPs of her mailserver, NOT her own IPs. Keep checking othe
- "UK" evas a dating webmaster who sees everything behind the scene what others don't see, I can tell you: only scammers mass-mail everybody, without even looking at profiles. Real people never do it. They may contact 10, 20, even 40 people at once if they are really bored LOL, but they will never sit and mass-mail for hours. I cannot believe that other dating services even permit it! But anyway, how can you, a regular member, tell if she is mass-mailing? If the dating service where you met her has a counter how many times the profile has been viewed, look at it. If she just recently joined and the counter already shows a lot of views, three times more than other pretty girls who joined about the same time, that means she IS mass-mailing everybody, the guys are looking because she mailed them = scam. Tip 6. Now,
the main part: how do you know she is from Mari EL? From her IP address! You can find her IP in the full e-mail headers. I assume you already know how to check the full headers on e-mail. If 2 The IP addresses are shown in bold (I show them in bold of course, in the real headers they are not going to be in bold!). Those are the 4 groups of numbers, separated by dots. Every computer on the earth has an IP address, including your own. The IP addresses are assigned to us by our Internet services providers when we go online. Some IPs in the e-mail headers are the IP addresses of your own mail server, in this case 184.108.40.206, which is Yahoo. Some are IP addresses of the scammer's mailserver (not of the scammer himself!), in this case 220.127.116.11 and 18.104.22.168, which is mail.ru, the free webmail in Russia. And finally, 22.214.171.124 this is an actual IP address of the scammer's computer. This is where the message originates from, this is EXTREMLY important information. Also, X-Mailer is the e-mail client they are using: basically, this is a software they use to read and send e-mails. Russians scammers, by some reason, almost always use "The Bat!". While hardly any of you are using it, right? ;) Please read this very interesting article why Russian scammers use The Bat!. Beware!! recently they started using other IPs that you can find in headers. Don't forget about those which may look like that: (email@example.com with plain). Finally, if she is a scammer, you'll get IP saying something like that: inetnum: 126.96.36.199 - 188.8.131.52 netname: RT-CLNT-MARTELCOM descr: VolgaTelecom Mari El branch Or like that: inetnum: 184.108.40.206 - 220.127.116.11 netname: RT-CLNT-MARTELCOM descr: Mari El Net descr: Volgatelecom Mari El branch Or like that: inetnum: 18.104.22.168 - 22.214.171.124 netname: NIKA-EKO descr: JS Nika-Eko descr: Russia, Yoshkar-Ola Or like that: inetnum: 126.96.36.199 - 188.8.131.52 netname: RT-CLNT-MARIEL descr: Bank Mari El of Sberbank Russia descr: Russia, Mari El Or like that: inetnum: 184.108.40.206 - 220.127.116.11 netname: RT-CLNT-TAXNET descr: The Tax Service of The Mari El Republic descr: Russia, Mari El, Yoshkar-Ola Or like that: inetnum: 195.161STRATO-RZG-KA descr: Strato Rechenzentrum, Berlin country: DE Whenever you see any of those, this is a scam. The IP ranges may be different, but if it shows any of the above mentioned providers or says something about Mari El, it's a scam. I never had any good registrations from those Internet providers. Not a single one, only crap! And all e-mail headers of scammy e-mails that guys forward me always contain one of those. Of course there are also good people using these providers, but they are not on the dating sites placing profiles, lying about their real homecity and contacting (or should I say: mass-mailing??) US men. If it's a real girl, the result returned for at least one IP found in the full e-mail headers should match the city she says she is from. Make sure you don't confuse her provider with her mailservice. Her mailservice is whatever her e-mail extension is: yandex, rambler, pochta.ru, list.ru, mail.ru, hotmail, yahoo, gmail, etc..
If she says she is from Omsk, Samara, Saint-Petersburg, Kiev, etc... her Internet service provider's city shoud match her city. If it doesn't match, it's highly suspicious, and if I was you I wouldn't write to her. Very simple! If she is from a very small city, then find out which big city is the closest one to her village, and her Internet provider should be from there. Though honestly the chances that you will get contacted by some REAL Russian girl from some small Russian village in the middle of nowhere is almost zero. And most likely she will not look like a model. I never saw that happening, honestly. All those Orshanka, Zelenodolsk or Chistopol are inventions of scammers. These cities do exist of course, but on the map. Not on the dating services! Sometimes they use Cyprus provider Plantesky, or SatGate of Sweden (18.104.22.168), or Strato of Berlin (81.169.147.x), or LeaseWeb of Netherlands (85.17.3.x), or the American servers: reverse.layeredtech.com aka Layered Technologies (IP ranges 209.67.208.x - 209.67.223.x), from Kazan, or Cheboksary, or Yoshkar-Ola, or... the United States! LOL If you don't believe me, join my site and enter something like that in the search form. Out of all my Russian girls, I bet you will not find a single profile like that on THIS site!! But sometimes they are not so stupid, and copy the profile descriptions from somebody else's profile, written in a good English. If that happens, half of Mari El starts using and re-using it, like this one for example: "The main thing about me is probably that I am a purposeful person and always reach my goal and that I am always ready top work hard for it. At the same time I am a very soft person and dreamy.... I like to surround myself with beautiful things, to make coziness always bringing smith special in the atmosphere and in all I do. I always have many friends in my house as I am able to listen to a person and to support him both in his hard times and the happiest moments. I dislike dull and monotonous life and want my life to be exciting and to have great moments of joy. I am fond of surprises and can be a spontaneous person myself though I am never irresponsible. I truly believe in love and want to raise my children in the atmosphere of love and respect on the patterns of their parents." They may also try to play smartarses and change it a bit, so it sounds more like it was written by a Russian girl, with mistakes. Or maybe they run an English text through their broken translator?? "The main thing about me - it is probable, that I am the purposeful person and always I reach my purpose and that I am always ready top, work hard for this purpose. At the same time I - very much the gentle person and pensive.... I like to surround me with beautiful things to make a cosiness, always bringing to the smith special in an atmosphere and everything, I make. I always have many friends in my house as I am capable to listen to the person and to support him and in his hard times and the happiest moments. I do not love a sad and monotonous life and I want, that my life was fascinating and had the big moments of pleasure. I like surprise and I can be independent the direct person though I am never irresponsible. I really believe in love and I want to lift my children in an atmosphere of love and respect attitudes on samples of attitudes of their parents." Here is another favorite Mari El quote:
Just a girlfriend
"You can believe me, when I tell you, you've never met a woman quite like me. I am very romantic, kind, calm, devoted woman, who does like home coziness. I enjoy good company, music. I adore literature, ballet, like to dance, to go to the theater and cinema. Like any woman I am fond of talking but at the same time I am a good listener. Marriage for me is a mutual work of two people. I suppose the man should be the head of the family. And the woman duty is to respect his opinion even if it differs. It would be a boring world if we all had the same ideas! I like a smart, honest man, who has a good sense of humor. I would like to meet a man who likes this life, enjoys it, who loves children and does want to have friendly family." Whenever you read this, just turn around and go! Tip 2. Enter the sentence from her profile description in quotes in Google. If it returns many results with different names, locations, or even photos, it is obviously a scam! Tip 3. Another indication of scam: when the girl says in her profile or in the first letter to you that all Russian men drink too much. Like this typical scammy profile description: "I have very bad marriage experience.My husband drinked too much.We divorce. Now i want to find partner not from Russia, because i dont like russia mens of they most drinking ability." Excuse me, but this is a bunch of bull! First of all, even if everybody around her was indeed a drunkard, why the hell she would put that in her profile?! Besides, not all Russian men are drunkard, but probably those from her own social circle. I am originally from Kiev, Ukraine, and none of my family or friends "drink too much". Now, if I was raised in the US in the trailer park with a drive-by-shooting, yeah, probably all men around me would be the drug addicts. That doesn't speak bad of men in general, but of the girl herself! If this is the kind of friends she has, it's her own problem. If any American girl put in her profile that "she searches for love online because everybody around her is a drug addict" what would you think about such girl?! Another proof that scammers are not smart people. I never saw any normal Russian girl putting something like that in her profile. Anyway, when you see that about Russian men, it is an indication of scam. Tip 4. Now, from profile description to location. Most of the scam originates from Mari El (the capital city is Yoshkar Ola, or Yoshka), but they very rarely put in their profiles that they are really from Mari El or Yoshkar Ola. In most cases they list other cities. Their favorite 3 are Kazan, Kirov and Cheboksary. Those are small poor cities, located not even in the European part of Russia. But when you look at all those Russian profiles, it seems like most people in Russia live in Kazan, Kirov or Cheboksary! There are two times more online profiles from Kazan than from Moscow for example, with all its millions of population, higher level of life, where people have jobs, have computers at home... Isn't it weird? Every time you see Kazan, Kirov or Cheboksary (not to mention Mari El itself!!), that's a huge red flag! Though they may put any other city, of course. Another important point I need to make about location. Often scammers put in their profiles that they are from USA or UK. When questioned, they say this is because the dating service doesn't allow registrations from Russia. In most cases, THIS IS A LIE!. To check if it is a lie or not, just go to a site's search form. If there is an option "Russia" in the country field, than the registrations from Russia are perfectly allowed. And if a site allows contacts for free, it will definitely allow such contacts from Russians as well. If in doubt, ask administration. There is a small percentage of sites that really don't allow registrations from Russia.
Netsonic (IP ranges 66.180.160.x - 66.180.175.x), InterCage (IP ranges 216.255.176.x - 216.255.191.x) and FDC Servers.net (66.90.75.x). Recently, we have noticed the significant increase of those. Remember: this is a 100% scam. All 4 below mentioned providers are used by Mari El scammers, so whenever you see these, it basically means: just another Mari El pest. OrgName: Netsonic OrgID: NESO Address: PO Box 28283 City: Green Bay StateProv: WI PostalCode: 54304 Country: US or OrgName: Layered Technologies, Inc. OrgID: LAYER-3 Address: 18816 Preston Road Address: Suite #100 City: Dallas StateProv: TX PostalCode: 75252 Country: US or inetnum: 22.214.171.124 - 126.96.36.199 netname: LEASEWEB descr: LeaseWeb descr: P.O. Box 616 descr: 3500AP, Utrecht descr: Netherlands descr: www.leaseweb.com or OrgName: InterCage, Inc. OrgID: INTER-359 Address: 1955 Monument Blvd. Address: #236 City: Concord StateProv: CA PostalCode: 94520 Country: US If you cannot identify her IP or it shows some other country (the UK, USA, Germany, Netherlands, France, Lebanon, Iran, etc..) this may mean she is using anonymous proxy and is trying to hide her real IP. Worse for her, this is 100% scam: real people have nothing to hide and most likely don't even know how to do it! If you run into this situation, get stuck resolving her IP and have your suspicions about some girl, you may forward her full e-mail headers to me and I will check it out. But those are rare cases, most likely she will be using either VolgaTelecom Mari El branch, or Nata-Info, or Fokus-Satcom, or Uaonline. I keep watching them, and if they change providers I'll update this page with new info. Now, about other scam sources. There is a scam source in Kazan itself: inetnum: 188.8.131.52 - 184.108.40.206 netname: INTELSET-NET descr: OAO Intelset network country: RU and inetnum: 220.127.116.11 - 18.104.22.168 netname: BANCORP-KAZAN-DIALUP1 descr: DialUp pool country: RU And several scam sources in Lugansk: inetnum: 22.214.171.124 - 126.96.36.199 netname: UA-IS descr: SLW Internet-Service descr: Lugansk and inetnum: 188.8.131.52 - 184.108.40.206 netname: MAGEAL-NET-UA descr: Interprise Mageal ISP and inetnum: 220.127.116.11 - 18.104.22.168 netname: UKRTELNET descr: Ukrtelecom IP access network in Lugansk descr: JSC Ukrtelecom and inetnum: 22.214.171.124 - 126.96.36.199 netname: DSIP-NET descr: Digital Service country: UA There is also a scammer from Bryansk: Sergey Zavoloko, or Sergey Simonov. At first he writes like as if he is a "girl", he usually uses the pictures of models, which are obviously fake, if you ask me. Anyway, this "girl" wants to come visit you and refers you to some bogus travel agency (Alliance travel, Global travel, Around of the World, whatever) and the manager of this "travel agency" sure is Sergey Zavoloko or Sergey Simonov. He is rather dumb though: if you look at the e-mail headers from him and "girls", you will see this line: Received: from [188.8.131.52] (port=40984 helo=sergey) IP and port number may be different, but that "helo=sergey" part is the name of his Windows machine, which he carelessly leaves in all headers! His IP range: inetnum: 184.108.40.206 - 220.127.116.11 netname: DEBRYANSK7 descr: BryanskSvyazInform country: RU Watch out for those, too. As for other "freelance" scammers, I'm not aware of their IPs. You see, they are like UFOs. I believe they do exist, but never actually saw one live, and none of the people whom I personally know ever saw an UFO. The same with the freelance scammers. LOL If you happen to run into one, let me know! And finally: of course there are probably good girls living in Mari El. But I never saw a single real one on any English language dating service. 100% of profiles placed from Mari El are scam. And unfortunately, they completely discredited that area (just
REAL Russian girls
like Nigerian scams discredited Nigeria). Don't take any chances on Mari El girls! At least until that gang is taken out. There is plenty of other, much better fish in the ocean. Once in a blue moon I hear the story that somebody met a girl from Mari El who was nice and real. Well, that's probably true! But you know what: once in a blue moon I also hear a story that somebody won a million dollar jackpot in Vegas on a slot machine. That's probably also true! But that doesn't mean that I will rush to Vegas and blow all my money hopeing that I'll hit it too! Be smart, the chances of both things hapenning are the same. Stay away from Mari El. This is my personal opinion though. In your place I wouldn't write to them. But what you do with this information is up to you. And please don't ask me: are you sure??? Yes, I am absolutely sure. But I am not going to convince anybody. I banned them all from this site because I don't want to see them here. This is my site and I have a right to decide who is welcomed here and who is not. Similarly, it's your life and you
decide whom you want in your life and w
Russian girl in Estonia
Thank you. We are busy because we are good. We are good because we are trained and experienced. We treat every case individually. We will never be the lowest bidder, because we believe that you will get what you pay for and if chance is what you want, we cannot help you. However, if accuracy, thoroughness, and results are what you are seeking, then we are your answer. We are licensed and insured. We operate an agency from a real business office. We have global resources. Choose us if your issues are truly important to you. We Specilize in Locating Long Lost Friends and Family Members Who can we help you find? Long Lost Friends Family Members Witnesses Debtors Deadbeat Parents Missing Person Locates Skip Trace Witness Locates Debtors One of our specialties is people locates of all types. Our resources enable us to find virtually anyone almost anywhere! There are a variety of methods to locate individuals including specialized databases, and time-proven professional investigative techniques which can often allow us to locate someone in hours -- or even minutes -- when others have been searching fruitlessly for years and failed! Let a Professional start on your caseWhat if you had to spend 15% of your income on her every month? If a lady receives her emails at an agency (Internet cafe), you need to think about making your communication free for the lady - it will mean that if she keeps writing to you it's not because the agency asked her (to ask you for money later) but because she really likes you. The solution is simple as everything is genuine: use a third party email forwarding service. No, I don't mean all those services that print letters somewhere in Moscow and send them across the country. You can use such a way once but to develop a relationship, it takes time. What you need is a local agency located in the same city/town where your lady lives. It must NOT be the lady's dating agency! You should find another service, and use only its help. Your letters must be handed to the lady IN PERSON, not sent by mail. The agency should phone your lady when they receive mail for her, so she
I have tried to look for a solution. Unfortunately, I cannot give any very good references. The easiest and the cheapest way is to post your problem to our genealogy mailing-list. The probability of getting a detailed answer is very small, however, as the circle of readers of this list is relatively small. If you suppose that some of your relatives are still living in Estonia, you may succeed in obtaining some more information about them from Estonian Population Register, as I suppose that looking for relatives may be an example of a justified interest for access to personal data (see the WEB-page, referred above, more detailed information is given in the Estonian version of this page). If you are interested in general resources you can use over the WEB, you may start from the home-page of the Estonian Genealogical Society. You can learn also about the origins of your own surname with the help of Onomastika NET (in Estonian, acessible only from Estonian Educational and Research Network). If you know that some of your relatives have been sent to Siberia or repressed in other ways during or after the Second World War, you may be interested in looking into the Occupation Museum, giving the databases of political arrests in Estonia and Estonian casualties in Second World War (unfortunately only Introductions in English and most text in Estonian, but they contain lot of data about many persons) Probably, the most interesting is to try to look over the Internet for people in Estonia, who have the surname you are interested in, and then try to contact them over the Internet, by phone or by ordinary mail. If so, you may first check, how many persons with particular surname lived in Estonia in 1995 using the database of Estonian names (text in Estonian). You may find also on the WEB some Estonian family trees.219.32 - 18.104.22.168 netname: NETTCH descr: Network Technologies, Yoshkar-Ola, Mari El, Russia country: RU Or like that: inetnum: 22.214.171.124 - 126.96.36.199 netname: SEDNA descr: Sedna,Ltd, Yoshkar-Ola, Mari El, Russia country: RU Or like that: inetnum: 188.8.131.52 - 184.108.40.206 netname: NATA-INFO descr: Nata-Info Dial-Up Network country: RU Or like that: inetnum: 220.127.116.11 - 18.104.22.168 netname: FOKUS-SATCOM descr: infrastructure network for satcom CC country: de Or like that (NEW provider! Very popular! Probably instead of Fokus-Satcom, which is apparently not used anymore): inetnum: 22.214.171.124 - 126.96.36.199 netname: itelsat-access descr: Itelsat access network country: de Or like that: inetnum: 188.8.131.52 - 184.108.40.206 org: ORG-ICC2-RIPE netname: RU-CSI-990913 descr: International Communications Company Or like that: inetnum: 220.127.116.11 - 18.104.22.168 netname: . The good starting point for a general search is Estonia-Wide Web, where you can find references to more than 1400 personal WEB-pages in Estonia, as well as reference to Estonian E-mail addresses catalogue more than 10 000 entries to use, you must know 3 words in Estonian: eesnimi = first name; perenimi = surname; alustada otsingut = search it is sufficient to fill in the surname field and click on search, reference to private phone directory lot of information, minimum Estonian for this page: Otsin eratelefoni: = Looking for a private phone: Üle Eesti = Whole Estonia it is sufficient to fill in the name field, select in the menu "Üle Eesti" and click on "OK". and more. If you need help with the Estonian language, you can use the WEB-dictionary. The shortcoming of this method is that many unrelated persons may have the same surname. Therefore, more promising are the following ways. If you know that some of your relatives have lived in Estonia and you want to find other relatives, still living in Estonia, then for such problems there is a special solicitor bureau, where everyone can ask for help. Their address is Välisõigusabi Advokaadibüroo PK 425 EE10504 Tallinn Estonia Their phone is (372) 6 44 44 11 and fax is (372) 6 44 51 24. Here 372 is the code for Estonia, 2 is the code for Tallinn and the rest is the local phone number. In address ä and ü denote respectively a and u with umlauts and õ denotes o with tilde (letters from Estonian alphabet). Their e-mail address is firstname.lastname@example.org. They will help you to find some closest relatives living in Estonia and with their help you can dig deeper. There is a fee for this service and it depends on how complicated the case is. It will be helpful if you know the name, date and place of birth and congregation to which he/she belonged, of at least one person of interest who lived or lives in Estonia, but often less information will do as well. The expected cost of the help for looking for relatives is about US$400. This law office may research also your family history back to 1790-1810 in which case the fees will also be about US$400 or more. Estonian Biographical Center in Tartu, Estonia, offers professional help of genealogical research or finding your relatives in Estonia. Also it will do any kind of archival research (farm or village history, real estate history, research on Estonian organisations etc). Their address is: Estonian Biographical Center (Eesti Isikuloo Keskus) Tiigi 10-51 51003 Tartu Estonia Their phone and fax number is +372 7 420 882 and cellular phone number +372 52 88 329. Email: email@example.com. Their home page is at http://www.isik.ee/english. They charge an hourly fee (see http://www.isik.ee/english/#prices for current rates). Director of Estonian Biographical Center is a professional genealogist Fred Puss who has BA degree in archival studies from the University of Tartu. If these possibilities are too expensive for you, then theoretically there is also a cheaper way - if you know which region of Estonia your relatives are from, you can write a letter or e-mail, or call to the corresponding regional Family registry office and ask for their help. For this you need not to pay, but officially they need not answer to you either (and often they do not). If you are planning to visit Estonia, then you can visit Estonian Historical Archives at: Eesti Ajalooarhiiv Liivi 4 50409 Tartu Estonia (phone +372 738-7500) and in their reading rooms do your research by yourself without any payment. To have some idea what kind of documents you can find there, you may first have a look on the following examples. Finally, there are also some possibilities to obtain genealogical information about Estonians from sources outside Estonia.before you make considerable emotional investments in the wrong person. You must not worry "What if my correspondent is a scammer". If you act in the recommended way, scammers will leave you alone! Don't worry about them. Worry about honest, sincere women that you will drive away if you think they may be scammers. Yes, that's right - if you tell any honest, sincere woman that you suspect her in being a scammer and request her to prove that she is not, this will be THE END of your relationship. Scammers will design all kind of proves for you - fake passports, fake visas, real bookings of flights and tickets, real phone calls, specially arranged photos etc, etc. Real girl will just walk away. You will insult her with your suspicions and she will never be able to recover from that. Remember: once you tell a woman you suspect her in being a scammer, your relationship is doomed! There are LOTS more sincere honest women who are genuinely looking for love and partnership than dishonest people who may try to scam you. I meet many women looking for a foreign partner during my visits to Russia and Ukraine. They all are honest and sincere women truly looking for a soul mate. I was also one of them. They are sensitive and vulnerable, and very uncertain if their search will be successful - just like you. All they want is to love and be loved and respected in return. At a meeting with girls seeking partners abroad (I am second to the right, in the zebra blouse) From time to time I receive letters from real women that are looking for partners abroad and came across the Black List. They are shocked! They say "You are awful, how can you put Russian women down so much, it is not true!" They know so many other honest women seeking somebody abroad or the ones who are already married to foreigners -- and they don't know a single scammer! This is one of such letters that I received: Dear friends, I really appreciate what you are doing here. I have not registered my profile here yet... maybe, later. What did I want to say? Just a simple comment regarding your article about scammers. I am a decent Russian girl, Oksana is my name. I am a teacher of English but due to Russian economy I have to have a bunch of not-so-very-well-paid-part-time jobs, including teaching, interpreting, and psychology. Of course I am not satisfied with Russian reality and of course I want to relocate... but not for the sake of relocating ONLY, I want this step to be based on mutual attraction, love etc... well, hopefully you understand me. So me not being a mercenary girl, I cant figure out: where do you see so many scammers succeeding in ripping off western men? I think these are more exaggerated stories of men. Let me reveal you one simple and, alas, as it seems to me, eternal truth: men from abroad are unbelievably GREEDY and they NEVER ever trust... even if you don't ask them for anything at all (my case: I try to be always responsible and decent and neutral in my letters)... but the undeniable fact based on my personal experience is that during 2,5 years (!) of me sincerely and ardently trying to find a husband, by means of writing super-numerous letters (making all of them PERSONAL), putting my HEART into relationship... me, the girl, who knows English much better than the vast majority of these Russian dolls:-)... me, who is really GENUINE in my intention to find LOVE... I have NEVER been presented even a single FLOWER or a mere post-card for my birthday, not talking of New Year, good old St. Valentine etc........ So, dear friends, my question is: where do you find these victims of the horrible Russian scammers? I have never seen any... though maybe its because I never tried and will never try to ask for a simple gesture of attention....... but I think that no matter whether you ask or not ask you will still be left without flowers, believe my big experience! Russian men are different. Its a pity the country is rolling down to alcohol and drugs... otherwise I would stay here. But on the other hand I see hardly anything to do with the generosity of the HEART (not wallet... wallet is only the reflection of this trait, if you want) on the behalf of your dear male-individuals... but I don't give up! I still hope to find a simple normal guy who would not hesitate to send me a candy at least once a year - for my birthday... or... maybe a crumb of bread :-)))) (that's a joke; we don't have a problem with buying bread here!) But, honestly speaking, believe me, I will not beg for alms... and the conclusion is that whatever happens I would rather die than ask for anything. Though the foreign men would not display any generosity in 99 percents out of 100 cases... trust my grave statistics! So I guess I am doomed to always get letters from men about mistrust, scammers, etc..... based on NOTHING. But I will publish my ad in your place upon your consent, of course... though, dear friends, my hope is almost at zero. I write letters during my free time, and I hardly have mental or moral energy to prove to every single guy that I am me and not a con, and that black is not white... see what you are doing with these articles about Russians? But no problem, I will continue to lose my eye sight writing self-justifications, that humiliate me and... my nation. Sorry, but this is my sincere outlook on the matter. Very tired, but not giving up, Oksana Yes, I receive similar letters regularly; and it is not easy to explain these girls where all the stories about scammers are coming from; by the end of this book you will understand why real Russian girls believe that stories about scammers are exaggerated and untrue. Because there are so many real girls sincerely looking for LOVE and just so few scammers - but scammers are professionals, and they contact thousands of men - when a real girl will struggle with writing letters to 5-10 men at a time. So 99 real girls will write at most 990 letters while one scammer can write 3,000-5,000 letters. Men see an inverted pyramid and judge by the number of scam letters around; girls see the real picture and judge by the number of real honest girls that they personally know who are looking for somebody abroad . Of course these Russian girls writing those disappointed letters, as well as men, don't read through all the listings and they cannot believe it when they see so many names on the list. What they don't know is that most listings actually belong to the same people under new aliases. If you take time to read them (it IS boring!), you will see it for yourself. Scammers don't even bother writing new letters! The same set of prewritten letters goes from scam to scam, from one alias to another. Actually, 99% of all scams originate from personals sites where anyone can place his/her ad for free, and targeted at men who are NOT looking for a Russian wife. Scam related problems almost never arise when using a reputable service specialized in foreign brides - but for this case you will have the knowledge that this book supplies you with. You must keep it in mind but enter a new relationship with an open heart. Read this article like a traffic regulation: if you obey the rules and don't drive too fast, you will be safe. Talking about figures, if you choose 10 girls from a foreign brides agency, chances that ONE of the 10 is a scammer are less than 5%. So if you develop quality relationship with, for example, 3 ladies and come to Russia to meet them all, there is a 100% guarantee that 2 will be honest and sincere, even if you do nothing to secure yourself from scammers. But if you use the techniques described in this Guide, you will secure yourself against of scammers and gold diggers of any type. Formula for success: Specialized Russian dating agency + corresponding with several ladies = 100% chance to find an honest sincere woman. OK, we were going to talk about scams. Let's start from the very beginning. What is a SCAM? A scam is the consequences of acts undertaken by a dishonest person whose sole aim is to steal your money. So all means and different tactics that scammers use will eventually lead to a situation where you are to give some amount of money to the dubious person. The possible reasons for the money transfer can vary, from payment for email or buying ticket to visit You, to renting apartments for your future visit or paying for urgent operation for "her child". [I use "HE" to name a scammer throughout this article only to make distinction between a scammer and a real woman.
A scammer may be a male as well as female.] Usually you will be asked to transfer some amount via Western Union - the organization that provides cash transfers to any country in the world and money can be picked up immediately. The transferred amount cannot be refunded, even if you paid by credit card. A scam may be performed by a loner or group of well organized criminals. He/they may rent apartments, mobile phones and postal boxes solely for the aim of scams, as well as use innocent people to receive money transfers, giving them a false reason why they cannot receive the transfer themselves (lost passport, he already received too many transfers that can cause tax problems, etc). The innocent person usually does not know anything about the real situation, and also may not know the scammer well (i.e. does not know his full name and address). The scammer may give $10-50 to the receiver for her troubles, saying that the money came from his business partner or a relative. Click here to see what type of women are used by scammers to receive money transfers. A scammer first develops a relationship with a potential victim via email. The acquaintance usually originates from a free personals website. Most often a scammer initiates the contact himself. How to detect a SCAM? There are some definite red flags but normally you won't be able to say for sure it is a SCAM before the money matters arise. You will never be able to say if the letter you received from a pretty lady is genuine or if it is a scam. Scam letters are different from genuine letters only in one feature: you will never think it is a scam! Scam letters are composed by people whose best knowledge is people's psychology, particularly the men's psychology. You will bet your finger that the letter is genuine, but it may turn out to be not. You will think that a woman from the picture cannot be a scammer because her face is the face of a decent honest person, and probably the woman on the picture really is. But scammers rarely use their own pictures! They take any picture of a beautiful Russian (or even not Russian) female, better a set of pictures, and use them for their dubious purposes. They buy photos from photo studios, or an innocent woman may be invited for a "photo probe" and she will not even know that her photos are used in this way. Another way is downloading photos from the Internet, scanning from magazines or asking relatives/friends for their younger pictures. (As you can expect, the person from the photos has no idea what her photos are used for - would YOU give your photos to somebody knowing he is going to use it for a crime?) So leave your talents of physiognomist to real world meetings, and accept the realities of a virtual relationship. The red flags are: The "woman" falls in love with you very quickly, within 3-5 letters; A new picture (more and more provocative) is sent with every letter; She talks a lot about issues of honesty and trust; She does not answer your questions, or answers are not included in the main text of the letter - seems as though somebody just added them to a letter that was prewritten (you might think it's because of the language barrier). Letters arrive regularly; often the same time of the day, every day or 5 days a week; Looking for a long-lost friend? Perhaps siblings separated at early ages? Or what if you'd like to know more about a prospective tenant or employee? Get the Facts on Anyone can help. Investigative reporter will teach you how to unearth useful data about your subject. King packs a lot of information into the chapters, covering everything from basic research techniques and the use of readily available resources to details on how to detect "paper trippers" with false identities. You'll also learn how to find "missing" people and how to get background information on others through a wide range of sources: newspapers, court records, military records, and "special methods" including license-plate surveillance and garbage analysis. Some of King's advice seems a bit paranoid (he advises "backgrounding" dates, lovers, and spouses), but much of it is valuable: Knowing the details of your lawyer's or physician's professional past would certainly help grant peace of mind. A great bibliography and lists of databases point you to additional sources for in-depth searches. This book would be a useful reference to employers, landlords, and anyone engaged in genealogical research. Journalists and other detail-oriented researchers will find it invaluable. Get the Facts on Anyone will teach you how to follow leads, paper trails, and your own instinct to find the information you desire.She wants to meet you as soon as possible to "prove" her love to you, and the best option is her visiting you; she has a way of getting a visa to your country without any problem, and it covers even USA and Canada where to get a visa for a single Russian female is virtually impossible (usually with the help of relatives or University); She draws attractive pictures of what you two can do when you meet... very romantic! If you hesitate or try to do things in your way, she becomes very upset/angry, and claims that if you don't trust her it's better not to meet/correspond at all and end the relationship. The common phrase used by scammers is "Your acts tell more than your words". Those are DEFINITE red flags, and if your situation develops like this, forget about this "woman". Some men told me that they cannot forget the woman and will go on, getting her or breaking their hearts. They forget the fact that in reality THEY ARE NOT IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH THE WOMAN. They are corresponding with a criminal whose sole aim is to rip them off. All is false - pictures, letters, words and feelings. If your correspondent behaves in such a way, IT IS NOT A REAL WOMAN. It is a scammer!!! There are some corresponding danger signs that you should also watch out for. Those signs do not make the picture on their own but often accompany scams: The woman is VERY attractive and younger than you; She is surprisingly mature and all she wants from life is a happy family and children; she is not interested in things that are typical for her age like discos, parties, dancing, fashion, night clubs, career, and of course she is not interested in your money; She is usually a student or has a very modest income; she is seldom a professional or business owner, she is never successful and does not live well even according to the Russian standards; She is frequently using words such as 'dear', 'lovely' along with your name or without it throughout the letters, sometimes in every second sentence. She does not have children and has never been married. "Light" scammers may list 1 child under 10 years old; but it is very unusual. There is something miserable about her situation that makes you feel sorry for her (her father left them when she was a baby and her mother struggled to bring her up; her mother/child is very sick; she had to move to a strange city where she does not have friends, her parents are dead, etc). As I said, those signs do not indicate with confidence that you are entering a scam, and not all of them will appear in a scam. If a woman is genuine, she IS interested in your financial situation (she must care about whether you are able to provide for a family), but she also will not ask directly. Instead, she may ask something about your work or where you live/what type of house you have, but it is also not necessary. Disinterest in your money matters does not mean anything, as well as interest in it is not a bad sign. An attractive young woman may be interested in you because you are successful and have a strong personality, and it does not necessary mean a scammer. She may happen to be a student, too. So it is virtually impossible to detect a scam in the very beginning. In the beginning everything looks fine, and when you start feeling something towards a woman, you tend to misinterpret the slight danger signs, or even close your eyes to the fact that you may be scammed.not send the money, she will try to persuade you for a while, but eventually will also disappear. Lately scammers developed a new variant: she needs additional money to show at customs that she will be able to support herself during her stay; she needs money for medical insurance or they will not let her on the plane; her grandmother gets very sick and she needs money for the operation, it's why she has to delay her trip to you; or she was using a car of her friend and bumped another car badly and needs to pay both the owner of the car and the victim of the accident - does not matter what is the reason for additional money request (s), but she needs some additional money to fix the situation. The scammer continues to ask for more and more money until you say you are not going to send any more money, then she says you betrayed her and broke her heart, and you just like all the other men, she trusted you and cannot believe you were able to do it to her, etc etc... So you wonder who is the bad one until you find exactly the same story happened to somebody else. (Variant: she had been mugged in Moscow, and is about to die; her
when you can say with 99% confidence that it is a scam from day 1 is when a "Russian woman" contacted you - I mean, wrote to YOU first - There is NO WAY this contact is real ! Most likely you are corresponding with a man! It is men behind of most of those scams! They only use women to receive money transfers. (Click here to see what kind of "beauties" receive those transfers.) Those pretty girls from photos have no idea about you! Scammers buy photos to use or simply hire semi-professional models to pose for the pictures. Please read Questions and Answers section at the end of the Guide for more details.IMPORTANT: An unmarried Russian woman has zero chances of receiving a tourist (or any other visitor's visa) to the USA. Never believe anyone who says they can "buy" a visa to the USA to visit you by using an agency or a relative. It is a scam for sure, no matter what kind of proves the scammers may present. They will never arrive and your money that you send them will disappear. NOTE: Things are different for other countries than the USA; read on.through an online personals site such as Kiss.com, Udate.com, One-and-Only.com, FriendFinder.com, Match.com, Matchdoctor.com, Datingfaces.com, Singlesnet.com etc, where anyone can place an ad for free. But responding to the ads requires payment of a membership fee, and this is what most men don't take in consideration. In Russia very few people have credit cards - and payment by credit card is the only way Internet personals accept payments. So a woman from Russia living in poverty CANNOT HAVE A WAY TO PAY THE MEMBERSHIP FEE! Only if she is a top-income professional (for Russia it's $250 per month and up), then there is a chance she can have a credit card. So if a single Russian girl answered your ad on an Internet personals website, your first question must be: How did she pay the membership fee? DO ASK THIS QUESTION!!!!!!!!!) Typical SCAM situations I can describe dozens of situations how a scam can go on, and there are even a few ways where you would never guess it was a scam. Here are the typical situations that may develop with slight variations. Let's start from the more prominent cases and finish with the subtle ones. Situation 1 (most typical!) You posted your profile to a personals site, you did not look for a Russian woman, just a mate. Suddenly a young attractive Russian female contacts you (asking to write to her on her "personal email address", not through the dating site), and you become closer and closer as correspondence develops. Most often in the beginning of correspondence she will ask you to write to a different email address again, because the old one worked badly or any other problem (doing this scammers separate the men who "took the bait" from the ones who did not - according to a personals site, scammers contact 3000 (!) men a day). You find her not only attractive but intelligent and smart, she is also very sweet, caring and giving. You start developing feelings for her. She quickly falls in love with you, you are so different from the men of her homeland. They are cruel, selfish, unfaithful, addicted to alcohol and all they want from her is sex. She has never in her life met such an attentive and understanding man like you. It is the hand of Providence that brought you together, and you two are made for each other. She is very confident in her feelings and all she wants is to meet you in person and love you for the rest of her life. You may feel confused, but such a strong feeling from a young beautiful lady flatters you. You like her though you are not so sure about your feelings. You would not go to through all the trouble to travel to Russia to meet her, but she is eager to come herself, so... So what? Why not? It would be nice to have such a pretty girl here! She can receive a visa with the help of travel agency (her relative works in Embassy, she works in a travel agency, she can arrive on student visa on the student exchange program etc), it only requires payment of $350 ($240, $315 etc). Not a lot of money, after all! So you hesitate a little bit but eventually send it. In a few days she's got her visa, now she needs money to buy a ticket. Most often she can get discount airfare (her
relative/friend/herself works in a travel agency/airport/air company). All you need to do is just transfer her $700-1500. Once you sent her some money for the visa, you feel it would be stupid to pull out now, and you send money for tickets, too. (Or she may request money for visa and ticket together, then the amount is likely to be more because she is not doing it herself but with the help of an "agency" - up to $2000-3000.) After you have sent the requested amounts, you never hear from her again. If you do mother/father/aunt/friend contacts you to explain the situation. Here you feel you were the reason for her travel and (possible) death, and in deep depression you grieve for years... Variant: she already has the tickets so she says she will anyway come to your country and will find your home and look at you from the distance and cry... I think the variants are endless.) They develop the endings like this so you never think you have been scammed. Even though scammers use many different variations, this situation is easily recognizable. The common features are: The contact is unsolicited - she wrote to you first. The content of her letters to you does not relate to what you write in your letters - no matter what you write, she does not discuss the same topic in length. Your questions are seldom answered; if they ARE answered, it is in the beginning or the end of her letter and the answer is not detailed and is not connected to the contents of the letters itself. Her letters often include some sad stories that shake your emotions and make you vulnerable. Those letters are PREWRITTEN and could be addressed to anybody. A new photo is sent with every letter, at least for the first 5-6 letters. Photos become more and more revealing close to a money request. Letters arrive regularly; may be the same time of the day, every day or 5 days a week (Monday-Friday); there is a certain pattern when they arrive to your mailbox. The woman expresses her unconditional love to you; no matter if you are hesitating, say that you cannot return her feelings as yet, try to discourage her because of your age difference, say you are married, don't have much money, etc, etc - she is not put off by anything. Often the scammer starts describing her sexual dreams about you, sending you poems (in English), cannot stop talking about her love - even if you say nothing encouraging. She does not care how much money do you make, she just loves you no matter what. et. You are getting used to her letters, and wait for them with great impatience. Suddenly your correspondent informs you that it is her last letter to you: something happened. Her Internet debt is too big and her service provider cuts her off (her mother is very sick and urgently needs expensive surgery). If she does not pay the necessary amount in 2 days, she won't be able to communicate with you anymore. The amount required may vary from $50 to $1500, but the common theme for this variant is - the necessary amount is requested urgently and should be paid in full. If you transfer "her" money, she disappears. If you hesitate, she will try to urge you saying that she has borrowed money from her acquaintance with HUGE interest, and does not know how she is going to pay it back with her salary. But she will make a plan, she just cannot stand loosing you, she likes you too much (she is devoted to her mother and will do anything to help her; she will probably have to sell her flat to cover the debt). Again, if you decide to help her and transfer her the money, she disappears. Situation 3 You correspond with a nice lady via email, she is young and beautiful. You develop strong feelings for each other (at least you do), and you decide to visit her. She willingly offers you her help in organizing your visit. She can arrange a visa for you and nice apartments with a beautiful bedroom with double bed, and it will cost you only $500! Compared with $120 per day that you would pay at a hotel it's nothing! And she will be able to cook for you, you will have full privacy etc. You never had problems with contacting her via email, so you never asked for her postal address, and she does not have phone at home. You transfer her the requested amount and start preparing you visit. She disappears. You are worried sick as to what could have happened to her, and are ready to hire a private detective to figure it out when you realize that you have no idea where to look for her. Situation 4 You wrote to a lady from one of the agencies on the Internet (variation: a lady from one of the agencies wrote to you). You received her response (her initial letter in response to your ad), and she seems to be a sincere and kind person, and she liked you very much. She answered all your questions, and it does not look like her letter was pre-written. But along with the lady's response (her letter to you) you receive a letter from the agency's owner with a request to pre-pay your correspondence. It says that the Internet is very expensive in Russia (it is) and women cannot afford to pay for sending/receiving letters, so if you want to correspond with this lady, you must pre-pay your correspondence. If a lady is young and beautiful, it is likely that you will be tempted to pay requested $30 ($50, $5 per letter) to continue correspondence with her. This situation is typical for local Russian agencies and the way they work. The lady applied to their service, and they represent her interests. There may be 4 variants behind the situation: This is a real agency; this is a real girl; she is really interested in you; This is a real agency; this is a real girl; man and will make one lucky woman very happy. She wishes you all the best and will always remember you in her prayers. What do you do? You say "Damn!" and reproach yourself for being so stupid - you should have traveled to see her sooner and get her! Only two weeks ago she could have been yours! Meanwhile your lady never considered you as a match! She probably is even married!!! It's just her way of making a living. You would not even think about $300-400 that you have transferred her during the time of your "dating". Having a dozen of nice correspondents who prefer to "get to know each other better" before making the important decision she safely plays her lead until the subject of a prospective meeting arises. You would never again phone a lady who is engaged to another man, would you? Usually a scammer does not bother to make the scenario gentle. Normally money request is straightforward and it takes him only a few letters to get to the point. I described th
she is not interested in you but the agency asked her to correspond with you and she is doing that to please the agency; This is a real agency; this is a real girl; but she has never seen your letter (possible variant: she is already married but the agency keeps using her data); all correspondence originates from the agency itself; There is no such woman; there is no such an agency; somebody just pretends to be an agency and will disappear once you have sent the requested amount; and of course there is no way to track the "lady" who attracted your attention. It was just a picture. Even if the woman is real and the agency represents her with her permission and good will, HER FIRST LETTER IS ALWAYS PRE-WRITTEN. It is too much trouble for ladies to write a new letter to everybody, because all men ask exactly the same: "Please tell me more about yourself, your family, your work and the city where you live, what your likes and dislikes are". Also, most agencies do not give ladies all the initial letters arriving for them. If anyone can write to a lady free of charge, there are dozens of letters arriving every day. Who is going to pay for them? Even printing letters costs money - amortization, ink and paper, let alone downloading messages and photos via expensive Internet connection. If you pre-pay correspondence with the lady, she will probably see your letters, but do not hope that the agency will forward your letters free of charge. The agency will tell you that the lady liked you, and wants to correspond with you; it's why they ask you to finance it. They will try to ensure you that they would not ask you to pre-pay correspondence if a lady was not interested in you. This may be true, and may be not. I know for sure that many agencies do not show women all the arriving letters, but send responses without women's knowledge. The person responsible for handling men's letters will answer the particular questions, if there are some, and you will have the complete impression that the letter was written specially for you. No way. The letter is in a file on the agency's computer, and the only difference may be whether the girl has seen your data and photo or not. The initial introduction letter is always prewritten (actually there is nothing wrong with it; anyway a lady is supposed to give you more information about herself, and this information does not change with every new correspondent). So the fact that the first letter is prewritten does not mean anything, good or bad. What means something is the fact that even if the lady is real, the agency will try to persuade her to respond to you (if you pay!) regardless of her sincere disinterest. In the worst cases the agency knowing for sure that she will not be interested in you, start corresponding with you on its own, without the woman's knowledge. So you pay for the correspondence, perhaps for translations, and receive letters from "your lady". In reality you may be corresponding with an agency owner, and the girl knows nothing about you. You probably have sent her flowers through the agency, and had her pictured with the gift. It's her, the same lady that you have seen in the photo. The fact that the picture was taken at another delivery does not appear to you. The agency, once delivered flowers to the lady from one of her admires, does not bother to do it again and just keeps using the same picture. After a while you decide to visit your lady, and then the agency informs you that the girl recently was on vacation and met a guy that she fell in love with. And they will offer somebody else for you to write to, there are plenty of pretty girls in their agency! Situation 5 This is the case where you don't even guess that you are scammed. You correspond with a nice pretty lady who likes you and you decide to help her in paying for her correspondence. She may not ask you for help but mention a couple of times that she could not respond promptly because she was waiting for her salary, or something like this and after a while you decide to transfer her some money to not be a burden on her modest budget. Meanwhile you occasionally talk by phone, you send her flowers and received her picture of her with your gift, and she is the same lady you have seen on the initial photos and even prettier. Everything looks all right (and likely it is!). The above scenario is 100% normal. You don't have anything to worry about: the woman is real, you know her postal address and phone number, and things just never seemed better. Meanwhile, you may be entering a scam!!! After a few months of correspondence (during which you continually supported your correspondent so she could easily respond to your more and more blossoming letters) you decide to visit your lady, and start talking about the future visit to her city. And here the hell rushes! The Woman Of Your Dreams suddenly reports that she has something very important to tell you. She does not know where to start, and she feels guilty. But she must collect herself and still tell you. Yesterday (last week) she met a wonderful guy that she used to date when she was at school. And they realized that all those years they were madly in love, and are made for each other. (She corresponded with another western man and last week he visited her, and she has already made up her mind). She does not want to hurt you, and she will always consider you as a friend, but she has decided to go on with her life and hopes you will forgive her. You are a wonderful
e last two situations to show you that you may be scammed without even being aware of it! How can I secure myself against a SCAM? All above mentioned scenarios have hundreds variants that make scams hardly recognizable and some men enter different scams a few times. But regardless of what tactic a scammer uses, there is ALWAYS money involved, without money there is no scam! As a rule of thumb, remember: an honest woman will NOT ask you for money. Why? Because she needs you; she wants to be with you as badly as you need her. Isn't email and sending mail abroad expensive? Yes, they are. For general reading you may have a look on the home-page devoted to the book "Estonian Experience and Roots" (ethnic Estonian genealogy with historical perspective, social influences and possible family history resources) by Sigrid Renate Maldonado, or access the page of Federation of East European Family History Societies, which contains many links to different sources of information on Eastern European region. If you are willing to pay some amount of money for getting genealogical information, you may visit Family Tree Maker Online and you can get access to personal records of 470 million persons. The same site contains also links to more than 45000 WEB pages of genealogical interest. Yet another way to get started in genealogy is to go to your local Family History Center at The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormon church - you do not have to be a Mormon) and in the locality catalog check if they have microfilmed the records from the region you are interested in (they have done it for several regions in Estonia - some overview of regions, microfilmed in Estonia is given in e-mail by Arvo Tars, or you can start direct search at FamilySearch). You can then order the film for four week at relatively moderate price to cover postage. Start with the earliest period you have solid information about, especially the parish, then work backwards from what you find. Most of the records before 1918 are in a mixture of German and Estonian, with a short period from 1890 to 1918 also in Russian.But any woman is capable to bear such expenses - if she is really interested in YOU, and does not correspond with dozens other men. (Subtle hints are possible and normal.) Any woman who makes money matters the necessary condition of continuing your relationship with her SHOULD BE AVOIDED! So the easiest way to avoid being scammed is to NEVER EVER send money to any woman that you correspond with. Simple. However, this way suffers from grave shortcomings: you may invest considerable amount of time and emotional energy in a completely wrong person before the truth comes up. And after reading this, you are going to be suspicious of just about anything. You don't have to be. All you need to do is to eliminate money matters from the very beginning of your correspondence. You also don't have to leave your lady high and dry - it's just a normal human desire to take care of her contacting you without spending her hard-earned salary. How it is possible to eliminate money from your relationship though still help her to contact you with zero expense? Let's see where you can be asked for money. 1. Correspondence via email Yes, email is undoubtedly the easiest and most powerful way of interacting with a female from distant Russia. Once you have a computer at your fingertips, it seems outrageous to write and send letters by mail and wait weeks for a response. Scammers know the power of email, and use it to their best advantage. Very seldom will you receive a "real" letter with a money request but via email it just seems ordinary. I do not force you to forget about corresponding via email. Not at all! But you must be more flexible, and do not see email as the only convenient means of communication. Good-old snail letters are still more understandable and "real" for Russian ladies. The first step on your way to a "scam-free" relationship is to get lady's postal address and phone number. I repeat this statement on almost every page of my website, and if you have read some materials there, you should already remember it quite well. Please follow this rule as if it was written on a stone fallen from heaven! Ask a lady for her postal address and phone number in THE VERY FIRST LETTER!!! (One of my clients made a special *signature* file for this purpose that was asking for lady's postal address and phone number as *PS*. I think it's a great idea: PS's always draw attention, and this is the last thing one sees before answering your letter. Very difficult to miss it out - only if you really try hard!) Give the lady your postal address and phone numbers - also in the first letter. For example: "Here is my address and phone numbers - so you know I am real! I hope you will also send me yours so if something happens, I know where to find you." It is also a good idea to ask where she stays and with whom - parents, relatives, renting a flat? Sometimes a woman can give you an address where she stays, and she is not registered there but at another address - it happens quite often. Russians have to have a registered address, and you cannot be registered at any address, there are some requirements. If you rent an apartment, you usually rent it from a private person - who does not pay taxes on this income - and of course will not let you be registered at this address. Sometimes people are registered at their grandparents' or family members' addresses where they don't stay. [Let me take a few minutes of your time and explain some basic things to you. It's all about property. In Russia some apartments still belong to the state, and people rent them from the state - but they can also "privatize" those apartments, and the apartments will belong to them. The state asks a very modest rent, and these days you cannot get such an apartment, it all comes from the communist times when people could own nothing. So generally speaking the "state's" apartment is your property - for which you don't pay taxes, and no one can take it from you, even the state itself. The apartments used to be given to people according to a waiting list by the (state) enterprise you were working for, and were given for free. The waiting list could take up to 10-15 years depending on the type of the enterprise you were working for - a building company would give you one in 2-3 years, a school - in 15 (or even longer) years. You stayed at the apartment paying only for communal services (which was less than 0.5% of your monthly income - even with low Russian salaries). You could request to register another person at your apartment only if she/he was a close family member and if the sanitary requirements (the number of square meters per person) would allow. Having a registered address (propiska) was very important because without propiska one could not find a job, study or do anything else. Propiska was a method of controlling the citizens. When a person to whom the apartment was given died, the members of his/her family who were registered there could continue living there. If nobody else was registered at the apartment, it would be taken back by the state. Now - at last! - here is the point of being registered somewhere where you don't live: usually older people register their grandchildren or other minors so they could inherit the apartment when they die. Now any apartment can be privatized in the name of the person/s who live there (for a small fee that is hundreds time less that the apartment's market value), and most of formerly state apartments are already privatized. But some people don't do it because it is still a bit cheaper to live in a state apartment than in your own, especially for older people who live on pension - you pay less for communal services and do not pay the property tax. But even if the apartment is privatized, there is still a point of being registered there. If the owner in his will gave the apartment to you, and you are registered there, you don't pay tax on the inheritance (which is quite high). Now I hope you have a better understanding of problems with registered addresses in Russia. Of course sometimes people just don't want to live with their parents/relatives where they are registered and prefer to live in a campus or rent an apartment on their own- but they still have to have a registered address.] OK, coming back to our manual. So you must ask a woman the address where she stays (and if it is her registered address) and her phone number. If a woman does not respond to your request to give you her contact details, forget about her. If you like her very much, ask second time - firmly. If she does not give you the requested details, she is not interested in establishing a serious relationship with you. The possible reason may be that she lives with somebody else (a male), and wants to have her cake and eat it; or she may have her doubts about you and doesn't want you to bother her too much; or she is a scammer - are you interested in finding it out? If you are particularly masochistic, go ahead. OK, all said before is not new for you. What is new, is that you must use the postal address and phone number that you have! And the sooner, the better. Write her a "real" letter and give her a call. Do not wait until "you need it". Send the letter by Russian courier service EMS Garantpost (in USA the name is "Express Mail Services", and you can send mail from any postal service point) - they require a positive identification, and do not hand mail over to neighbors and relatives like FedEx and DHL. Do not forget to include a self-addressed envelope and international coupon of post response with the letter (available from the post service), or better still, a prepaid return envelope with your postal address. For $20 you can send up to 500g stuff by courier service - send her a couple of glossy magazines or a guide to your city/town with many colorful pictures, or a self-made set of pictures of your house and neighborhood, something that will make her interested. Sending a "hard" letter has many advantages. Let me name a few: You will know that the postal address you have is correct and real; You may send her something nice like a flower from your garden that is impossible to do via email; The lady has something that she can see and touch, something "real" that makes you different from all her other virtual correspondents; You will need the hard letter for visa purposes if things for you and her work out; If your letter is returned undelivered, you know that there is something wrong. Well, coming back to the point. Having a lady's postal address and phone number is a must, but it will not ensure your protection against scammers. I promised to tell you how you can correspond with a lady via email without sending her money and still with no expense for her. First of all, ask your lady where she accesses her email and how much she pays for it. Her answer will be a proof of her sincerity. The prices on email services are about the following: Using email at an Internet cafe/postal service: $1-2 per hour; Sending 1 letter: $0.5 - $2 including typing; Receiving 1 letter: $0.25 - $2, including printing; Translation of 1 letter: $0.25 - $2 per page. Prices for women in agencies are about the same, but you cannot hope that the agency will offer such a cheap service to You. Women cannot afford to pay even those modest fees, you can - that's it. (I also pay more when I use services of my partners, simply because I am abroad!) If a woman has a computer at home (or uses a friend's machine), also do not believe that she pays $200 per month for the Internet. If she pays such money, it means she is online all the time! There are lots of packages offered by service providers, with the cheapest starting from as little as $10 per month. If you pay $25, you can access Internet from 00.00 to 8.00 without paying for the time, no matter how long you are online. Also the most popular among "light" Internet users are "cards" that are on sale from the postal service, which give you access to the Internet for a definite period of time - 1 hour, 2 hours, etc - that are very affordable, and of course do not cost more than access at an Internet cafe! The best is if your lady has access to email at work, it means she does not have to pay for it, and also can access it every day. The number of women who have a computer at home is rather small but still some women do have their own computers. But if your lady does not have free everyday access to the Internet, YOU MUST HELP HER. Because she needs it. Even spending $10-20 a month on correspondence with you leaves a big hole in her budget. The average salary is about $70 per month (after tax), so for her it's about 15-28% of her monthly income! We are a organization who have people from x countries in the world for us. We do analyse the cases with all honesty. 95% of the project posted in this website, have a solution. All that depends the information you gave us when start on a case. We are not God , but we are fair with our clients. We only charge the starting fees to begin a project,instead off others who ask for largest ammounts and then you not heard from them a word anymore! If you can find a PI who can do the job for less ... go for it, but in all reality they will be giving the results or they'll take your money only to tell you whoops... I tried, but could not get the info. In most cases email accounts are protected. You should file a police report and get a court to issue a subpoena for the IDs of these bad guys. I specilize in locating Missing People day in and day out. A retainer of $300 is required and the balance upon completion. could come and collect it. Usually it will be pretty easy to come to terms with another agency on conditions of the service; they will be eager to get some work. Ask them to give you their opinion of the lady. There is nothingsearch on Russian search engines (Mail.ru, Rambler, Yandex and others) or Google.com which is awesome and can be used for just about anything (I was absolutely amazed by the quality of the search results that was provided by this search engine! If you used any other search engine before, switch to Google.com and I promise you will never use the old one again). Type something like "marriage agency+CITY NAME". Usually there are will be a few matches. Choose the one that has LESS girls - it means they are new on the market and don't know the tricks of the trade yet, and also will appreciate modest money. You don't have to arrange long-term correspondence right away; first ask for help in handling only 1 letter. When they report that the work has been done, ask for their opinion of the lady, something like: "Thank you very much for your help! What do you think of my girl? Was she glad to receive my letter? ...." etc. If you are happy with the agency, and your lady is happy, too, (ask her about it!) - you have found the solution: you don't send money to the lady or her agency, and she does not pay for her emails. If she continues corresponding with you, it's only because she likes you. No money - no scam. If the lady has her own computer per month will do (if you write often or send many photos, then it must be double). You can also act through an agency in her city to pay for the Internet for her (or give her cards), or you can even send her the money by mail (saving on Western Union charges). Put a note in the postcard - usually it arrives OK, and it will be a very pleasant surprise for her! (And you will know the address she gave you and she herself are real.) 2. She needs to pay for her ticket/visa to visit You (meet You at a third country) This is a definite no-no! I understand that it would be much more convenient for you if she comes to your country, and it may be very tempting to have this beautiful creature in your bachelor's flat next e heaps of documents that she will have to collect including a letter from her employer. Dealing with authorities is frustrating all over the world but in Russia it is even worse. In foreign embassies people may stand in long queues for hours, sometimes outside in the rain or frost - it is not extreme, it is normal. I am not telling you stories; I experienced such things myself. Your girlfriend will have to go through it one day anyway if things for you and her work out; don't make it double jeopardy. The second, taking precautions, it's a lot of money, and sure you don't want to lose something around a thousand dollars due to your temptation. You still can arrange payment for lady's ticket from abroad in such a way that only you can receive a refund, but to pay for visa from abroad is impossible and it involves the risk of being scammed that we want to eliminate as an option. What's wrong with meeting in a third country? All said above about a visa is applicable to meeting in a third country, too, except if you decided to meet in a country where she does not need a visa to enter. Countries where Russian citizens don't need a visa: Andorra, Antigua, Armenia, Azerbaijan, Barbados, Belarus, British Virgin Islands, China, Columbia, Costa Rica, Dominican Republic, Ecuador, Egypt, Fiji, Grenada, Haiti, Honduras, Jamaica, Kyrgyzstan, Kazakhstan, Liechtenstein, Malaysia, Maldives, Moldavia, Monaco, Namibia, Romania, Samoa, Seychelles, Sri Lanka, St. Vincent, St. Lucia, Syria, Tajikistan, Tunisia, Turkey, Tuvalu, Uzbekistan, Ukraine. But when you invite a lady to meet in another (usually very beautiful and romantic) country, you must always keep in mind the following: women in Russia and other countries of the former Soviet Union cannot afford to travel abroad, and it is possible that she will accept such an offer only to see another country and have some fun not to see you with intentions towards future marriage. The same thing when you invite her to visit you in your country: if she has never been there, she may see it only as an opportunity to travel with zero expenses. One of the men I know invited a lady from Kiev to South Africa - "To see the country and me" meaning if she likes the country and him they can get married. She left her job - they did not want to give her leave - isn't that proof of serious intentions? Not at all! After she spent 1 month here, the man was a bit frustrated, and said she did not do ANYTHING at home, not even cooking, and it did not look like she was going to. All she did was shopping for clothes with his credit card and painting her nails. He asked me to talk to her about her intentions, and when I asked her if she was going to stay here with him, the answer was "I am not sure. My mother is alone there, and she misses me so much. And it's very boring here." I asked if she was going to go back home soon, the answer was "No, I still want to stay here". I was really surprised, and asked why she actually came here. You will never believe what the answer was: "But I came here for vacation only". Even if your lady is real and is not going to duck and dive with your "travel allowance", you still enter a risk of being scammed - that a lady will use the opportunity of free traveling without considering serious relationship/marriage. I know about other cases like this, and it's even not bad women, they don't think they are doing anything wrong, they just decided to use a generous offer and have some fun! So if you want to build scam-free relationship, you must make up your mind from the beginning that visiting your lady in Russia is the only right way to meet each other in person. No money - no scam. 3. She needs money to rent an apartment for you for the time of your visit You usually will need confirmation from a Russian hotel to receive a tourist voucher that the Russian Embassy requires in order to issue a visitor's visa, except if you travel on a business visa. (More details on Russian visas can be found here) Renting an apartment is again a temptation with a subtle dream about using its bedroom for much more than a comfortable night's sleep, and her sincere desire to take part in your travel arrangements looks so cute! Well, if you really want an apartment (which is usually much more convenient than hotel, by the way), rather use the services of the agency that you have found for email forwarding purposes. If you don't have such an agency, find it now. You are not only entering much less risky situation than when you are dealing with an individual, you also eliminate money matters from your relationship with a lady. No money - no scam. 4. She needs money to pay for an urgent operation for her child / mother / somebody else This is in 99% of cases a total nonsense. Never believe in any emergencies. If such a thing happens, she will usually request money from her friends and relatives not running to an agency/Internet cafe and writing to you about her helpless situation. Yes, she might say she had asked everybody and nobody could help - you must know that in Russia/Ukraine medical aid is free, and in a situation of life emergency they will treat the patient without delay. No one is going to die without treatment; doctors will do all they can. Some operations that don't hold a direct danger for life can require payment. If you feel that it may be the real thing and are willing to help, again, use the agency that you have found and ask them to check it. Nobody in need will be offended if you decide to check, especially if the amount requested is considerable. The right way of protecting yourself from scammers As we have established, no money - no scam. What does it mean? It means, that in the very first letter you must let your correspondents know that there is no chance of them receiving any money from you . If your letter happens to be sent to a scammer (as you NEVER know and there is no any way to establish if your correspondent is the one), he will see from it that you are a "dead end" and will leave you alone. This way you will save your energy and feelings for honest girls. You may be brutal and say: "All agencies on the Internet say one must never send money to a lady; I read about it so many times that I decided to follow the advice". Or you may make it gentle: "I have read on the Internet so many wonderful things about Russian women and their personal qualities, but there were also some stories about women who were looking for nothing but money. The only thing I gained from all those stories is that an honest woman will never ask for money, and the one who asks is not honest. Nevertheless, I really want to find a partner in your wonderful country, and I know there are many good honest women who sincerely want to love and be loved - just like me..." Having said so, your correspondent will hardly suspect that you think she can be the one of those dishonest women who are looking for nothing but money (by the way, most real Russian women have NO IDEA about the scams in international dating!), but if she is a scammer, she will get the message. You can invent your own version, but what should be said is: You are not a "green novice" to the Internet; You spent considerable time investigating information about meeting Russian women via Internet; You are aware of scams in the international dating industry; You know that you NEVER EVER should send money to your correspondents. If you do not feel that mentioning dishonesty in the first letter is appropriate, you can omit the above recommended action and only use the ways below. It does not mean that you must describe in detail stories about scams that you are aware of, and of course
Keep money scam
NEVER even mention your own experience of being scammed. First of all, it is a definite push off for your Lady, and also scammers when they know you were once so stupid to believe in stories - I would not mind!) TIP: It will be also a smart idea to say something like "I have a friend that works for police (Interpol)". You can tell about it when you describe your friends ("I was blessed to have wonderful friends; one of them, John, work for Interpol!"). You can also bring up this "friend" in your relationship later, if something seems fishy - as a test. Especially once any money was requested, scammers start carefully read the letters (though they may completely disregard letters written in between; for them correspondence is a just "copy and paste" process). The next step after the message about your "advanced knowledge" in the field of international dating is to make it clear that you have made provisions for all aspects of your relationship that may require money. Tell her that if she has problems with sending/receiving emails, you have found an agency in her city (do not name which one) where she can receive and send you letters absolutely free. It is also good to say that you do not believe that people can fall in love via Internet. Mention also, that if things for you two work out, the agency will also organize your trip to the city, and that you are intending to visit Russia (Ukraine, Belarus, etc) very soon. Better give an approximate date within the next 3-6 month - you can always change it later. Do not make statements, tell about it by the way. If you have the lady's postal address, rather say it in the letter that you are going to send by mail. The reason is that if a lady receives her emails at the agency, they will not be happy to read that you are going to use another agency for email forwarding and organizing your visit. The lady may even never see this letter and any other letters from you. What do you get by saying this? The lady can see that you are serious and have real intentions to find a wife don't just write for writing; You care about her and want to make things less complicated for her; You are not a dreamer and are ready to undertake the trouble of traveling to her native city; You are realistic and thoughtful; she will feel with you like "behind the stone wall". What she can gain from all those points is THAT YOU ARE FOR REAL. It will not only help you to separate yourself from all the other guys who are writing to her; it will give you a distinctive advantage. Russian saying is: "Better to have a tomtit in your hands than a crane in the sky" (English variant: "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush"). Even if the other guys are younger, more attractive and well established in life she will be more attentive to you because YOU ARE FOR REAL. You are coming to her city very soon and she will meet you! Always remember that women do not believe in the reality of your relationship; for them it's "too good to be true". For you corresponding with her is already a RELATIONSHIP; for her it's just a dream. I allowed myself to believe in the reality of what was happening to me 2 months after my marriage!!! It's another reason why real girls are so reserved and do not express their feelings openly: she is afraid to let herself go and then be terribly disappointed. What about scammers, they can see straight away that you are not taking nonsense. A scammer will probably throw a "trying" ball by saying how pleased "she" would be to organize your visit herself, or that if you invite "her" to your place you can save money for the honeymoon, or any other way that YOU SAVE YOUR MONEY if you use the option he offers. You must know that this is a definite red flag and total nonsense. No one "real" sincere woman will ever start talking about money, especially in the first letters. She does not know you and she does not care about your money. She will care about the money you spend when she knows for sure you belong to her, so your money is also partially hers - but not earlier! P.S.ve fun! Questions & Answers Inside this section you will find short advice on the most common situations. Please read this section very carefully; ALL questions one by one - even if your situation
Never Find friend
seems to be somewhat different. There might be slight variations which do not change the essence of the situation and the immigration rules. You might encounter one of the problems discussed here in the future and will be able to instantly recognize it. So, for your own sake - read it all. If you do not find advice for your particular situation, please do not hesitate to contact me. Send your request to firstname.lastname@example.org. I will answer it in priority order. But first - read the questions and answers below. Your lady does not have a phone at home It is possible that she really does not. Even in Moscow and St. Petersburg some flats do not have phone connections, and in regional cities only 25-40% of all households have telephones. But if your lady is working, she definitely should have a phone at work! If she is worried about her colleagues/boss who can hear your talks, you may arrange a phone call after hours or find a Russian translator. Also some agencies provide help with conference calls (for example, A Foreign Affair). The translator will call her, and then call you - and will translate your words. No English-speaking person will bother her at work. If she does not work or study, it's a bad sign. If she is a student, she should have friends or relatives, who have a phone, and you should ask her to arrange a call through them. Also, you must know that it's impossible to call collect from Russia (unless you use special "collect calls service" which works in Russia, but then you know what she should do - call a special number, quote a pre-paid card number etc). If a woman calls you herself because you insist you want to talk to her by phone, it does not prove her reality. Anyone can call you, you never know. When you have the phone number, check if it corresponds with her city code. "No contract" prepaid cell phones exist in Russia as well. She says she cannot talk to you by phone because of the language barrier Tell her you will speak very slowly or arrange a translator (see above). She says there is no sense in giving you her phone number because she is almost never at home Bad sign! There is virtually no job that requires a single female to travel that much. Most "traveling" jobs will never be given to a female, because it is not safe for a female to travel to strange cities and stay in hotels. Traveling is expensive, and it is cheaper for a company to have a representative in a city than to send somebody on a business trip. The same is applicable to a woman who gave you her home phone number but you must phone her only at a definite time arranged in advance. It means that she is not staying there. She may be staying with her boyfriend or just renting a flat for the purpose of scam. If you cannot reach a woman at her home phone number when you phone unexpectedly, you've got a problem. I know about a case when a guy has corresponded with a woman, who said she was traveling for work almost all the time, and he should phone her only at definite day and time. The rest of the time when he tried to phone, there was only an auto responder. She justified it by the fact that she was so tired after the trips that she needed to relax and switched off the phone. In a few weeks they came to the point of organizing their meeting. She requested $1200 to be paid at a bank account of a "travel company" that will take care of visa and tickets. Lucky guy, he found my page and said to "her" that he prefers to visit Russia himself. She said, they meet in her way or in no way. He did not agree, and she disappeared. Her phone did not answer anymore, and after a while there were other people living in the flat. She was renting it, specially for the purpose of the postal address and phone. Earning a few thousands dollars a month on scams, one can afford to rent a few flats for $50 per month. She says her mail box is broken (mail usually gets stolen), that's why there is no sense in giving you her postal address It is possible, though also should make you take precautions. Tell her that you are going to make her a surprise, and her mailbox is of no importance. Make an impression that you are going to send her a gift but do not say it directly. Ask her for her physical address instead. You received a letter from her addressed to another guy Well, you know yourself that it is not any good... I believe that you should be open and straightforward. Ask her about the letter and what's going on. Tell her about your feelings and how much she means to you. If she is sincere, it may even move your relationship to a new stage, more open and honest. She will also see that you are not a dumb loser, but a hard realist and "know your price" - and Russian women adore strong men! If you keep silent, she may find out herself that she sent the letter to a wrong guy, and feel too embarrassed to continue her relationship with you. If she is not sincere, this can be the end of her game because now the cards are open. Listen carefully to her explanations, and don't fool yourself. You started to correspond with her without knowing she is using an agency; now after a few emails she says she cannot write to you anymore because she does not have money. She asks if you can help her with payment for the emails. To prevent such situation from happening, you should have asked her in the very first letter, or at least in the second one, where she accesses her email and if she is using an agency. But if you failed to ask it beforehand, this is what you should know now. There are many dishonest agencies that place data of women on the Internet, and then correspond with men on their own, without women's knowledge. The women may really exist but know nothing about you. The famous scam area using this pattern is Lugansk in Ukraine. They attract men with the pictures of pretty women, and write nice seemingly sincere letters that answer your questions, and can even offer a street address of the woman without you asking for it. But after a few emails "the lady" informs you that she needs help in translations because she cannot translate your letters herself. He profile might indicate a good knowledge of English and you may be surprised. The explanation given is usually "I speak English good enough but I cannot write in English". Which is of course complete nonsense. Russians learn English at schools and most women can READ and TRANSLATE letters on their own, but they cannot SPEAK in the language. They can also write in English which is more difficult for them than reading and translating English letters but still MUCH easier than speaking. The Russian system of education was not aimed at personal contact with foreigners which was considered dangerous during the communist era but to be able to read in the foreign language and accumulate the knowledge which could be useful in building communism and fighting capitalism. Thus spoken English was not a priority. Russians do not use English in their everyday life and do not have English channels except CNN which is only available through cable TV - which is expensive and is not available to the majority of people. So where else could she learn spoken English without knowing how to read and write? Was she living for a long time in an English speaking country? If this is your situation, it usually means you are paying the agency for translations and in reality correspond with the agency's translator. So if you want to find out what's really going on, send a courier mail to the address provided (if not provided with an address, ask for it), include a letter about yourself and your photos, and a coupon of post response so she could answer you directly by regular mail without the agency. It is also advisable to translate your letter to Russian so even if she does not speak good English she would understand it. A good and inexpensive translation service is offered by Elena's Models: http://www.elenasmodels.com/services/adtransl.htm If you receive a response to your letter, continue corresponding by mail until you are sure the woman is really interested in you, at least until you have exchanged 2-3 letters. Then switch to another agency for email correspondence as was described earlier. She says that it will be much cheaper for you if you send her money for emails than to pay an agency for email forwarding It is true that arranging correspondence via email through an agency will cost you more. But do not forget that the aim of engaging third party services is to eliminate money matters from your relationship with ladies; eventually it will save you not only money but emotional energy and time. All said above about women and when they start caring about saving your money is applicable 100%. If she is honest, it should not bother her as long as she is not particularly greedy. She says it is better to meet in another city of Russia (Ukraine, Belarus etc) not her own town She might justify it by the lack of facilities and comfort in her native town; and it is possible she is sincere though usually a woman will be happy if you want to come to her place. She may feel embarrassed that her town is so small and dirty, with no things to see, that her flat is too small and old-furnished, etc. You must ensure her that it does not matter. You are coming to see HER, not other "things". You want to meet her family so they know who stole their daughter. If she insists on meeting in another city, there should be something wrong with her. She is probably involved with somebody else, and is afraid he/his friends will see you somewhere. You must decide yourself if you treasure her so much to continue. She disappeared without a notice It happens very often, and not only with men. I know a few cases when foreign boyfriends of my female clients disappeared without a word, and never returned emails or phone calls. And it happened after a few months of correspondence and phone calls, at the stage when they were planning a personal meeting. In most cases it means that the other party decided to withdraw but does not have guts to tell it as it is. I understand it may be very frustrating and even heartbreaking, but you have to get over it. Try to contact your correspondent via regular mail, and send her a postcard with your address enclosed. Ask her to just mail this postcard so you know she is OK. Say that you are not furious or anything, you just want her to let you know that she does not want to contact you anymore. You will understand and accept her decision if she has decided to end your relationship; and only wish her all the best. You just want to know that she is all right. Hiring a private detective to track down your girl is not a good idea. If she is OK, and she wants to contact you, she will find a way. If she is not OK, there is almost nothing you can do; her relatives/parents will give her your letter and she can decide herself if she wants to contact you again. I know a case when a woman went through a terrible car accident; almost all bones in her body were broken, she was struggling for life, and she had a foreign boyfriend who was supposed to come for a visit in a few weeks. If such a thing happened, you may be willing to help; but still do it only if you are sure she is real (i.e. you exchanged many letters, phone calls, you really have developed feeling for her and know it is not a trick, and you really care for her). If she is OK, and she does not want to know you anymore, she probably has met somebody else, and if this is the case, then the only thing you can do is to forget about her. Find Anyone, Anywhere Looking for an old friend, lost love or former classmate? com master database searches dozens of databases with billions of records to provide you with possible current contact information for the person you are searching for. It is always free to search. You can also perform a people search on yourself. Search for yourself today. Our people search reports may contain: • Full name (including married names, aliases and a.k.a’s when available) • Date of birth (as reported) • Address • Phone number I tried to find an agency in my lady's city; I could not come rightThis is the list of my reliable and known for a long time partners in cities: Moscow and the region (any city within 250 km from Moscow, including Tver, Ryazan and other cities) Uncle Pasha's Consultants and Facilitators - This is NOT a dating agency. Professional services of Olesya Pomazan and Paul Voytinsky ("Uncle Pasha") can, however, be of great value to anyone who plans to travel to Russia, and especially to men with an interest in Russian women. They can, for example, start by checking the existence and identity of the person you are corresponding with. They can interview the woman of your choice and provide a professional opinion on her personality and intentions. They can film her on video so that you'd get a fuller and more realistic picture. Gift delivery, accommodation in Moscow, guide and translator support are available from this versatile team. (email@example.com) Ekaterinburg Alexander Korjev - a small dating and tourist agency. I know Alexander for many years. Any conventional service, verifying of address through the informational database, flower delivery + personal opinion available. (firstname.lastname@example.org) St. Petersburg Classic - a dating agency. (email@example.com) Novosibirsk Amenity - a dating agency. Good, reputable agency, many years of experience. All range of services. (Viktor@amenint.com) Vladivostok Origin - a dating agency. Many years of partnership, good people doing an honest job. Correspondence, gift delivery, address verification, custom services. (firstname.lastname@example.org) Yoshkar- Ola Maksim's Introduction Agency - many years of experience and hundreds satisfied clients. Minsk Spatkanne - a dating agency. The owner Vitaly Stupnikov is a person of honor. Visas, personal flowers and gifts delivery, correspondence, translation, organizing of your visit to Belarus and meeting with a girl from any Belorussian city. (Email: email@example.com) Kiev Elena's Models office in Kiev, Ukraine. Background checks on Kiev and Ukraine girls, gift delivery, any custom services on request. They can purchase a ticket for your girl and mail it to her and book her accommodation in Kiev, so you do not need to send her money directly. If you want to visit her in her home city, they can buy tickets for your trip to that city, meet you at the airport and arrange a transfer or if you wish, show you around in Kiev first. And if your romance does not work, you can meet girls from our agency - we have thousands on the books. (Email: firstname.lastname@example.org) Lugansk 2 oceans Of Love - a dating agency. (http://2oceansoflove.com/) Donetsk Duet - a dating agency. The owner - Victoria Lazarenko (email@example.com) "Several weeks ago you recommended me to the Duet Agency in Donetsk. I have been working with Victoria from this agency and I want to let you know that she is outstanding. She has been very helpful and I cannot even tell you how much I recommend her and this agency. Thank you for the referral." (Lawrence, USA) I also cooperate with agencies in 70+ other cities of Russia, Ukraine, Belarus and Kazakhstan. I can connect you directly to an agency in the city where your correspondent lives. If you decide on this way, please send your email to firstname.lastname@example.org. Give me: the name of the city; the name of the agency you met your lady through (or the local agency you are corresponding through). I will give you address of the agency in the city (if I have one). You can contact the agency yourself, and decide if you want to work through them. I do not have any interest in this venture. If you are not happy with the agency, please let me know. I usually have a few partners in every city, and can advise you on another service. Also, it is possible to seek help from anybody else in the city - all you need is a person who has everyday access to the Internet and is willing to help you. You can locate such a person through search engines. I highly recommend Google (http://www.google.com) as it analyzes every word on the web page and I find its results the most relevant; it's especially useful in a case with obscure words and phrases. It is my favorite search engine, and I am sure it will be yours, too. How can I check if the agency I use (I am going to use) is legitimate? It is very easy. 1) They must have their contact details on their web site (see pages "Feedback" or "Contact us"). The contact details must include their address and phone number, and preferably a fax number too - if they only offer their email address, this is not enough. 2) Phone them and ask some questions. Is there a live person on the other end or is it just an autoresponder? If it is the latter, try again, and if you do not have any luck, rather don't risk your money by doing business with them. There are many services on the Internet that allow you to set up a voice box and supply you with a phone number (some of those services are even free). If you cannot talk to a live person when you phone during office hours (check time difference with your place), this is a bad sign. 3) Send an email to their email address and ask some questions. How fast they respond, if ever? Do they really try to help you? Do you think they will be willing to assist you if something goes wrong? If they don't bother about answering questions of their prospective clients, they will not be much more helpful after they've got your money. 4) Is there a name of the owner on the website or other factual information about the company? Check the pages "About us". 5) The agency should have their own domain name, which means something like www.agency.com and NOT like www.agency.narod.ru. If it is a third level domain (if there is an extra dot between "www" and the country extension, .ru OR .com OR co.uk), then it is likely to be a free service where anyone can set up a website. Be extremely careful with websites located on free servers. If the website address looks like www.somename.com/clients/~agency, then it is likely to be a free website, too. If the agency name looks like www.agency.com, you can check whois record for the website - who registered the domain name and is paying for it at http://www.betterwhois.com. 6) It is very important that the agency accepts credit cards. If the company is serious and professional, they will be able to process credit cards. A merchant account (a bank account that is necessary for processing credit cards) is not easy to obtain, and if the company has one, they will not want to jeopardize it. The best Russian-based agencies already offer credit cards payments, and if the agency is western-based, accepting credit cards for them is a must. backgrounds girl Paying on the Internet by credit card is the safest way to secure yourself against of scams, according to the Internet fraud complaint center of FBI (www.ifccfbi.gov). In this case you always have your credit card company on the guard. If you are afraid of credit card fraud, get another card specially for the purpose of online transactions, it can be even a debit card - nearly all online companies accept Visa debit, for example. Most legitimate companies will also accept your check or offer online check processing. 7) More ways to confirm the legitimacy of the company: Look for some reliability program seal - BBB Online, Trust-E, anti-scam associations, etc. Check their references, if they have some on the site, OR ask for references, if they don't. Put the name of the agency in the search engines (again, I highly recommend Google.com), and see what is popping up. Put the name of the person you are in contact with in the search engines. Put the name of the person on whose name the money should be sent in the search engines. If the agency only wants you to pay via Western Union or MoneyGram wire transfer, then you must be very careful with such company. You will never be able to receive a refund. Double and triple check everything before sending them money. If they, in addition, do not meet 2 or more of the other requirements above, forget about them - for your own sake. I cannot travel to Russia (because of my work, business, children etc). A lady can receive a visa to my country, and I know she is real. If you are confident that your lady is real and truly interested in you, you can invite her to your country, assuming that you are aware of the troubles she will face to receive a visa (see above). You must buy her a ticket through a travel agency in your country. In this case only you will be able to receive a refund. The ticket will be issued in Russia, and she must provide her passport to receive it. She will not be able to receive a refund or exchange it, and you don't need to send her money. They call it "sponsored tickets". What to do with the visa? You can ask the agency that you have found to help your lady with her visa. Many local dating agencies also work as tourist agencies, and can obtain visas without problems. (NOT TO USA, AUSTRALIA OR CANADA!!) My lady is a manager of a travel agency (variant: her family member works in the American Embassy), and she can receive visa to USA. I think it is great, and I am going to send her the money. Don't do it! The requirements for receiving visa are the same for anybody, and no relative or travel agent can help. If she can receive a visa, that's fine - let her do so. Buy the ticket YOURSELF, and she can pick it up at the airline. It won't be any problem for an honest person. She can say the agency will not help her with the visa if she does not order airfare through them. I have NEVER heard about such a (real) agency. It is definitely a scam. If you are still in doubt (and don't mind looking like a fool), phone the Embassy in her country and ask if they are aware of such an agency and do they really work with them. This agency (supposedly) is legitimate otherwise the Embassy would not work with them, correct? If it's about a relative working in the Embassy, it's even easier: ask for his/her phone number, and then check the Embassy's numbers. I bet they don't even look alike. Please do not be afraid of officials. They are much less dangerous and more trustworthy than any stranger you meet on the Internet. If "she" says you will ruin everything if you call the Embassy, it is likely to be the only honest thing she says: you will ruin her clever game. (See the contact details of the USA Embassies under the next question). My lady says she already has the USA visa. Is there any way I can check it? Most likely, it is a scam in order to make you send money for tickets and/or insurance and/or "pocket money". The only way to confirm it is to contact the immigration authorities. All US Consulates have world wide computerized system. Usually the US Consulate in the capital of the country where the person resides will be able to help you. Email the Consulate and ask them to confirm issuing visa for this person. If your email was not answered, phone. Remember that email address of the person working in government structure will never be at Hotmail.com, Mail.ru, List.ru, Inbox.ru or any other free email service. If you are given an email address of the person that "works in the Embassy" as a contact email and it is not @state.gov, this is a scam. Below you will find the details of US Consulates in Russia larus Telephone: +375 17 210-12-83; 217-7347; 217-7348 Fax: +375 17 234-78-53 After hours or in emergency call: +375 17 226-16-01 Site: http://minsk.usembassy.gov/ US Embassy in Chisinau, Moldova 103 Mateeveci Street, Chisinau, MD- 2009, Phone: +373-2-233-772; Fax: +373-2-233-044 Site: http://www.usembassy.md/ My lady says there is a service that can organize a student visa with a student exchange program, which may be obtained within a few weeks, she just needs money to pay for it. It is very difficult for a single Russian lady to receive such a visa. There are NO agencies that can guarantee a visa for USA, Canada or Australia. They can help her with travel arrangements (which as you know you MUST do yourself) but obtaining a visa is the responsibility of an individual. Most likely, it's one of the well-organized criminal groups that we were talking about. I bet your "lady" does not have a phone at home (variant: it's broken). If you do have a phone number for her - check the code of the city (you will find international codes in your local phone directory like White pages or Yellow pages): it is likely to be a mobile phone, and the city code does not correspond. Some scammers give men 2-3 phone numbers; one is supposedly a "home number', the other is a "work number", the third may be "mobile number" - but ALL three numbers are in reality untraceable mobile phone numbers without a contract. If a woman was the first to express her desire to visit you in USA (as well as Canada or Australia) - this must be a scam. Period. To receive this type of visa, the woman's parents must prove that they have legal income that will allow her to pay for her education and living in the USA (again, this legal income cannot be less than $500 per month) and the confirmation of enrollment from an American educational institute approved by USCIS (former INS). Student visas are not granted if there is no such confirmation. This information is from the website of USA Embassy in Moscow: Beginning September 11, 2002, the Department of State is required to receive electronic confirmation of enrollment for all student and exchange visitor visa applicants before a visa can be issued. Please contact your school or sponsoring institution to ensure that they have confirmed your enrollment using the new ISEAS system with the Department of State in Washington, DC. We will not be able to approve any F, J, or M visa application without enrollment confirmation. The term for receiving this type of visa may vary but of course it cannot be 2 or 3 weeks, it's impossible - and no one can give a guarantee that the visa will be granted. In one of the famous scams the group informs victims that "the lady's visa is pre-approved, and her deadline (to pay money for her travel package) is in 1 week". If you hear something like this, block the sender immediately and stop correspondence. The is no such a process as "pre-approval" for a USA visa. If you want to have some fun and waste their time as they wasted yours, send them to the bank couple of times with a fake money transfer number. Any visa to the countries mentioned above is difficult to obtain; and proof of a good financial situation of the applicant is required. This means visas are only given to people who have money to support themselves and pay their travel expenses. If she can receive the visa, it means she has money to pay for her tickets; and if she cannot pay for her tickets, she will NOT be granted a visa. The person can also receive a visa if she has a sponsor - a citizen of the country, who must legally apply to be her sponsor through the immigration authority of the country. The sponsor must be approved by the immigration authorities BEFORE the beneficiary can apply for a visa. If the person does not have a sponsor (who will be paying for her education and living) and her financial situation is doubtful (i.e. she cannot pay for herself), she will NEVER be able to receive a student visa. The authorities must make sure the person has the means of supporting herself during her stay in their country. There are legal student exchange programs but no "firm" can enroll somebody into such a program, and the programs are fully sponsored by the government or another legitimate organization, including tickets, visas, accommodation etc. If there was such a "firm", it would be illegal and it would be found out quickly and prosecuted. People working in the Embassies are not stupid and know about people who try to sneak into the country with a false reason. You will only hurt the chances of a person to ever enter your country if you try to B.S. the authorities. In the case of a woman claiming she can get a visa on some special program (a sport event, Red Cross, etc) ask her where you can get more information about the program: a phone number or URL. (Make sure it is a real thing and not a fake on a free server!) There is ALWAYS an official that can answer questions. You can ask a Russian speaking translator to phone the place (for example, from A Foreign Affair) and ask questions. (Again, don't forget to check the city phone code first.) It is absolutely impossible that such a program is covered with secrecy. What about the woman's mother if she wants to make sure her daughter is not in trouble and doing the right thing? Of course there must be a contact person to answer questions. (According to my knowledge such programs are also fully sponsored but it might happen some money will be needed.) Please read what US Embassy in Belarus says on their FAQ page (requirements are the same for all countries of the former Soviet Union): What documents are needed to be issued a visa? There are no specific documents required to be issued a visa. However, under U.S. immigration law, every person who applies for a nonimmigrant visa is presumed to be an immigrant who intends to remain in the United States. The applicant has the burden of overcoming this presumption. To do so, an applicant should be prepared to present evidence of strong family, economic and social ties that indicate they will return to Belarus. For example, an applicant might want to show that he owns an apartment, has a job, earns a certain salary (according to my knowledge it must be not less than USD 500 per month - E. P.), has a spouse or children by presenting documents to back up their claim. But just presenting a massive amount of documents does not mean an applicant will be qualified for a visa. The consular office looks at the overall situation of the individual before making a decision. (They have a profile of typical non-returnee and typical returnee. If your lady fits the profile of non-returnee, she will not receive the visa whatever documents she presents. Typically, officials are more than cautious in issuing visas to unmarried women under 40, does not matter if she leaves kids at home or not. They are the ones that officials say about "They never return" - E.P.) For what period of time is a visa valid? Currently the Embassy issued only one-entry visitor visas. Applicants should note that a U.S. visa is only permission to apply for entry at a port of entry in the United States. The visas are valid for three months. That means the visa holder must apply for entry during that three month period. It does not mean the visa is valid for a three-month stay. It is the U.S. Immigration and Naturalization Service officials at the ports of entry who determine if a person can enter the U.S., and if so, for how long they may remain. (It means your lady can be easily turned back right from the airport if USCIS (former INS) officials decide she is trying to sneak into the country and not going to come back; and I know such cases DO HAPPEN. - E. P.) Visa cost and processing fee?
It costs $100 to apply for a visa, and this is not refundable, whether you qualify for a visa or not. A one-entry visa for business or a visit is issued at no charge. The Embassy accepts only U.S. dollars. What tourist agencies work with the Embassy? Every applicant, whether traveling with a group or by themselves, must appear for a personal interview. No visas are issued through tourist agencies. Student visas To apply for a student visa a person needs to have an USCIS (former INS) approved I-20 form from a high school, a college or a university. The applicant also must provide evidence of sufficient funds to pay for educational and living expenses for the current year, as well as ongoing ability to pay in the future. I have also heard (from a guy who was involved with "somebody from Bulgaria") a story how a woman "won the Green Card" in Green Card Lottery which was about to expire because she could not afford travel expenses. What if he could send the money?... She would pay the money back when she finds work in USA... The rest you know: he sends the money, she never shows up. (By the way, the Green Card Lottery visa is only granted to persons that can afford travel expenses and support themselves in the first year, i.e. have at least US$10,125 in cash or possessions - according to the current poverty limit.) I have not came across a similar pattern in Russian/Ukrainian scams (which is the reason I refused to publish this comment on the Black List - I am not here to teach scammers new tricks!) but they are so clever, they can figure it out one day. Always check (with an Embassy or other official instance) if the person really has the visa she claims to have BEFORE sending any money for travel expenses. Don't believe in "scanned copies of visa" etc - with the software we have nowadays I do not trust ANY computer picture. It is the matter of hours to change a photo, name and the number of the visa on a picture. (It also can be done to any other picture - for example, to put a face on a "family picture".) But if you have a scanned copy of the visa it is easier to check it with the Embassy according to the date of issue and the number, which is NOT necessary but could help the clerk at the Embassy to find it in 30 seconds instead of 45 - so do not bother to ask specially for the scanned copy, they have facility to search the database by the name. Once the person is really granted a visa, it will be confirmed. As the Russian saying goes: "Trust but check" - "Doveryaj no proveryaj" :-) Useful links: U.S. Immigration and Naturalization Service: http://www.uscis.gov U.S. immigration law: http://www.usis.minsk.by/html/us_immigration_law.html Search engine to check who owns a domain name: http://www.betterwhois.com When checking a domain name, make sure it is a top level domain (something like name.com). If it is a third level domain (something like name.anothername.com or name.com/somename) it does not prove legitimacy of the site. Many service providers let their customers set up a free site under a sub-domain; all you need is just subscribe to the service which is possible to do anonymously. My girlfriend says she is going to the USA as au-pair, and we will be able to meet and spend time with each other, but she needs some additional money for the airfare. It is again the same pattern as with Green Card that mentioned in the previous paragraph. Of course it is a scam. Au-pair visas are only issued to people under 26 years old, who have an employment offer and an invitation from a registered US au-pair agency. This agency would be fully responsible for bringing the girl into the country. Her employer would be responsible for the financial support during her stay. Any person coming on au-pair visa would have her documents and airfare in order and will not need any financial support from a third party. My lady says she has a fiancee visa to USA but her fiance gave up on her; so she has a fiancee visa but no fiance. She says this visa will allow her to visit USA for 3 months. Well, it is again the same pattern as you could see in 2 previous questions, and of course it is a scam too. First of all, if a woman REALLY has this visa, and will come to USA, she cannot marry you anyway. According to the immigration legislation, she will have to leave the country and apply for another fiancee visa. Guess what kind of reaction it will have from authorities? Yes, you will have to collect TONS of papers, and every time there will be a new document that is needed, which will cause permanent delays in processing your application. Once she has a fiancee visa, she is on the list of special attention, and receiving a new visa will be very tough. From the other hand, by applying for a fiancee visa her fiance is financially responsible for her stay in the USA, and expenses to search for her and her possible deportation in the case she would not want to come back. Fiancee visa cannot be extended; after 90 days she must be married to the guy who sponsored her visa (only!), or she must leave the USA. Any person in sound mind would call back his fiancee visa application if he decided to break the engagement; so her visa would be cancelled and she will not be able to enter USA anyway even if she had a stamped visa in her passport. Remember this passage?It is the U.S. Immigration and Naturalization Service officials at the ports of entry who determine if a person can enter the U.S., and if so, for how long they may remain. She can fly all the way over the ocean, and will be turned back at immigration right at the airport. So even if what she says is true, it is virtually impossible she will be able to enter the USA with a fiancee visa granted due to her relationship with somebody else. It is also illegal to enter the USA on the fiancee visa while she is not even intending to be with her fiancee but with somebody else. Do you want problems with USA officials? I do not think so. The natural development of this situation will be her asking for money for ticket. And of course you understand that nobody will ever arrive to you if you send this money. My lady says (her agency manager says) that there is a debt of $150 ($200, $400) for the services of the agency that she used before our correspondence started, and she cannot write to me until the debt is finalized. There is no such a thing in Russia as using a service in credit. (Correction: not yet. It will be one day of course.) But for now everything is supposed to be paid cash in advance. There is even a famous phrase (from a popular movie): *Money in the morning, chairs in the evening. - Can we make chairs in the morning, and money in the evening? - Sure, but money first.* So it is simply impossible that a woman could accumulate such a debt. An agency simply would not give her service if she did not pay. With an average monthly salary of $70, do you think somebody would go wild and send letters that would put her on a starving diet for months? It is a scam - most possible, the woman has no idea that the agency asks this money from you. Agencies have no troubles adding a couple of phrases to women's letters. She says she does not have money to buy milk for her child because of her Internet expenses Be very cautious to women who say they need to pay monthly fee for using email of $50, $80 or $100. There is no such a thing. She is paying per piece, depending on how much she sends. Sad things like not buying milk for a child because she corresponds with you must not impress you. What kind of mother she is if refuses her child in vital things because of unnecessary expenses? Sure she could spend $20 for courses (or $1 for a book - books are very cheap in Russia), and learn to use the Internet on her own. If you receive a request to pay for her emails because she does not have money to buy food for her child, this is a 100% scam. An agency can have rules that the man must pay a monthly fee for using email for correspondence with a female member. In this case try to switch to another service as recommended above. She asked if I can help her to pay for her English courses because she wants to be able to talk to me without an interpreter when we meet in person. This is a TYPICAL SCAM REQUEST. The usual amount is $300-350. My advice is: never send money on any English courses until you met in person. I would suggest you rather purchase an electronic talking translator instead. It is a compact electronic device that can pronounce in Russian the word that you typed in English, and vice versa. According to men who traveled to Russia, it was the best investment they made. In this case you will be able to communicate with any Russian speaking person using the translator, and it certainly will NOT disappear without a notice (as it usually happens with people that ask for money for English courses). It is also an excellent language teacher. Click here to find out more about electronic talking translators. According to my experience and experience of other Russian wives abroad, the best English course is communication with people living in an English speaking country. All women that I know arrived without perfect knowledge of the language, and were able to speak nearly fluently in a years time. Kids learn even faster; my cousin arrived in America in November 2001, and in May 2002 her 7-year-old son received a certificate for his successes in art, math and English language, and his teacher said he was reading without any mistakes! Attending English courses prior to the moving abroad will not hurt of course, but leave ideas about sponsoring her courses until you met in person and like each other. All indications are my correspondent is a scammer, and I am going to ask her directly Don't do it!!! First of all, ask yourself, why do you need it. If she IS a scammer, the only answer you will receive, it's that you broke her heart, how she trusted you and ho
w you betrayed her. This is a normal reaction for a scammer. Usually men get lost after such a response: they want to believe the "woman", and start blaming themselves for being suspicious. A scammer KNOWS that he is scamming you. You don't need to inform him about it. And you cannot expect remorse. So what's the point? If your lady is sincere, you will ruin your relationship. She will never be able to recover from such a mistrust. If you say to a girl you worry if she is a scammer, she will be very offended. I know how it feels because we sometimes receive money from people that had some problem (such as their email was not answered, or they clicked on a link and it did not work, etc, etc) and they accuse us in being a scam, this feels real bad! And I don't feel like proving something to them; I would rather refund any money they paid to us and never hear from them again. If you ask an honest person if she is not a scammer, you show your own insecurity and it hurts your manly image in the woman's eyes. She also feels you are probably not sincere; why, you were telling her all those nice things girl and compliments, and now you say she is a scammer, how can she trust you? So, don't ask your correspondent if she is a scammer. Check it yourself. If you use an agency for correspondence, it's likely that all money requests originated from the agency (even though from the texts of letters it sounds like a request made by the lady). Make sure you have a direct contact with the lady herself, and try to establish email correspondence in the way when you don't send money to the lady or her agency. See if she is still interested in keeping contact with you. If a woman refuses to switch to another agency or other alternative way of contact, it is very suspicious. Practice shows that some women claim to have been using agencies for correspondence while they have their own computers and Internet connection at home, and pocket the money "for emails". What should I do if my lady's agency says that according to their rules a woman is not allowed to give me her address girls and phone, and all contacts must go only through the agency? This is the practice of many dishonest agencies. They collect data and photos from women who are looking for somebody abroad, acting as a "free" agency or even asking money from women for listing. Then they use women's data for their own gain.
The KievFPM@state.gov United States Embassy in Minsk, Belarus 46 Starovilenskaya St. Minsk BeIf you find an agency (or just anybody) in this city and ask them to help, it is not a big fuss. The fee for the service is very cheap (US $0.2 - 1.5); you probably will be asked some more money for the trouble. Knowing the address, you may ask them to visit this person and find out if she knows you - for example, the person can bring a small gift from you or a letter - and then it is clear if the lady knows you or not. - Hi, it's flowers from Jeff! - Who is Jeff??? OR: - Hi, it's flowers from Jeff! - Oh, Jeff Smith from America! I was wondering why he does not write for 3 days! I know cases when men were corresponding with existing girls, but when they found their addresses and phone numbers, the women did not know anything about their "correspondence" with the men. Still, what should I do if I need to send money to my lady? Yes, there are cases when you need to send money to your lady. Western Union www.westernunion.com and MoneyGram www.moneygram.com are 2 services that specialize in international transfers. MoneyGram has a flat rate of 10% per transfer; Western Union charges vary from 6% to 50% depending on the amount, the bigger the amount, the smaller the percentage they charge. But it is advisable to not send money until you have met in person. If you wish to help you lady with her email expenses but don't want to go through the trouble of finding an agency at her city, rather send money in a regular letter sent by registered mail. Put a $10-20 note inside a postcard, and don't include anything else in the envelope to keep the letter thin, or it can make some postman interested. It will not make a huge hole in your monthly budget but it will make a big difference in hers. Actually, the only way to make sure everything is OK is to have a trusted person visit your lady and see her in blood and flesh at the address she provided, and make sure she does know about you. Unfortunately there is a possibility of somebody using the data of a real woman without her knowledge, and even receiving money on her name - I have information that some scammers make a deal with unscrupulous Western Union operators and share the money they receive, so they don't need the real person to come and collect the money, they just need her passport data. Many use flower delivery services to make the check; it is also not bad but the problem is they don't care. They will use an email address (which you are supposed to provide) to contact the lady and make arrangement for the flowers to be delivered - and it can be arranged anywhere, at university etc where everybody has access. If you want to send flowers, I would advise Russian Service - they are reliable and honest. And of course, never use the flower delivery service of the agency you met your lady through (unless you are sure they are trustworthy and do it for the purpose of lightening her day and not for a check). But anyway, sending huge amounts for tickets and visa to somebody you've never met is simply stupid. Please don't fall into the trap of "long term relationship" - I know cases when men were corresponding with somebody for more than a year, "she" even was corresponding with guy's parents and still it was a scammer. The aim of a scammer is to develop trust, and they are VERY, VERY GOOD at it. You feel checking on her will be an indecent deed. I know a case where a guy was talking to "her" on the phone twice a week (of course, it was one of those "pay as you go" cell phones without a contract), and it was a very caring and kind person on the other side. Scammers are very clever and they feel nothing towards you. Trust no one. You can trust me though AND the people I recommend. Everyone asking for money to come and visit you (without you offering that first) must be avoided. Period. Don't let anybody lead you into such a situation; clear up everything from the beginning - you don't believe in love via the Internet, you are not sending money to anybody, you plan to visit her country soon and you can meet in person, and stick to it. They will not spend their time on you, again, scammers are clever and they are not idiots - why spend time in a vain when there are so many men who have no idea about scams and are easy prey. I believe that if you are truly looking for a lifetime partnership backgrounds and marriage, going to the lady's country to meet her in person is an honorable intention and a must. If you are just entertaining around and it is not serious for you, and money is not a problem, then go ahead - it is a type of Russian roulette where 7 of the 8 bullets are in the gun - lots of fun and excitement - if you enjoy such things! Last advice. If after all I said above you still want to send money to the person you never met (Mmmm... When was the last time you've seen your psychologist?), ask her for her father's name (patronymic name, or "otchestvo" - all Russian, Belarus and Ukrainian people use it in their documents) and her passport number. For the purpose of police investigation, patronymic name is of great help: there can be 300 people in her city having the same name and surname, and only 1 or 2 of them having the same patronymic name as her. Both Western Union and Money Gram have the option of test question: the question should be: "Your passport number", and the answer will be the number she gave you. She says her town is closed to foreigners and I will not be able to visit her in her home town. Yes, there are still some towns that are closed for foreigners. But it does not matter: there is ALWAYS a bigger city close by (not further than 100 km) that you can meet her in. Find a map of Russia and try to figure out where it is yourself. I know recently scammers use this tactic to confuse men. I actually never heard about any real woman for whom living in a "closed" city would be a problem. They know they will need to meet a guy in a city nearby, and usually have friends or family there that she can stay with during your meeting. So if your contact says you will not be able to visit her at her home city because foreigners are not allowed there, most likely it is a scam. The remedy - ask her what is the closest big city that is open for foreigners, and request her to meet you there. If she agrees, you will have to make a background check on her before booking tickets. I know only scammers who voiced being unable to meet because of living in a "closed" town. So you need to make sure she is real before spending money on tickets. Background checks can be found here. I am corresponding with a woman that I met through one of the online personals sites where anyone can place a free ad. She seems to be very "real" and our relationship is developing very well. You say those sites are not reliable, but I don't think my lady is a scammer. Question #1: Who wrote to whom? If it was her who wrote to you, most likely IT IS A SCAM! Remedy: Ask her how she gained premium membership to the site which requires payment. Play dumb and say if you would want to answer ads, you would need to pay. Ask her if she has a credit card. Listen carefully to the explanations! If she says it was her friend or acquaintance that paid for her membership, request the contact details (phone) of the person. If the person has a credit card, it is impossible she does not have a phone! Only top income people have credit cards in Russia/Ukraine, so they will have a phone at home. If it is her friend in a foreign country who got married to somebody, also ask for her phone number and also ask to talk to her friend's husband. It is possible her married friend wants to help her to find somebody abroad. In this case you just got lucky! It is true that many women in Russia become interested in marrying a foreigner after their friends found somebody abroad. Many my friends gave me their data and now seek husbands abroad seeing how happy I am. Also send email to the friend who paid for her membership and check the IP numbers in the return email. You can learn how to trace emails here. If it was you who answered her ad on the personals site, then she is likely to be real. Get her postal address and phone number, and use all instructions from above: clear up everything from the beginning - you don't believe in love via the Internet, you are not sending money to anybody, you plan to visit her country soon and you can meet in person, and stick to it. If your contact is good and real, she will be happy to see that you are serious about meeting her and it will only help you to win her heart! Gold diggers OK, all said above was about scammers that intend to rip you off remotely and keep their distance. But there is another flavor of scammer that I would rather call gold diggers. These are real women, beautiful and smart. And many of them are really looking for husbands. But they are looking for somebody very special, and usually, very rich... Meanwhile, they realized that after they meet a man in person, a lonely foreign man is ready for anything - entertainment, gifts, money... A gold digger will meet any man, and show him that she likes him, and that she wants to marry him. She will accept a ring if the man is willing to give it. She will have sexual relations with him if he insists but usually will try to avoid it. On the surface it looks very much like engagement situation. The only difference is: she is not intending to marry you. You may think that this is a very difficult situation, and it's impossible to detect such a scam. Yet gold diggers are also easily detectable, even from the beginning, and of course there are straightforward signs that you can spot during the personal meeting. As a rule, a gold digger lives in one of the easily accessible for foreigners city such as Moscow, St. Petersburg, Odessa or Kiev. I never heard about a gold digger from a small regional town. Capitals always have much better quality of life than regional cities, and standards of life in Moscow are similar to any other European city while the costs are cheaper. The average monthly salary in Moscow is about $250 (a professional can easily have a salary of $1000 and higher), while it's only $70 in regional cities and $50 in smaller towns. Moscow ladies are closer to European women than to typical Russian. One can have an absolutely fabulous life there - if she has money. Ladies from capitals have lots of opportunities to meet foreigners, there are dozens agencies that organize tours with socials, and all that a woman needs to be invited is to prove that she is not married at the given moment. Many ladies searching for husbands abroad go to socials organized by 5-6 different companies - actually they can do it every week if they want to. Foreigners in capitals are a fact of everyday life, and women tend to be very selective. If you are a resident of a small town or live in the country and have very average life, and are about to commit yourself to a lady who was born and grew up in such a city, you will plunge yourself into trouble. Your life styles are completely different. Even if at first she will be happy and in love with you, she will start missing her theatres and concerts with the time, and start feeling miserable. If you are from a small town, select girls from regional smaller cities and towns. As with the situation of a remote scam, gold diggers fall in love with you instantly, and want to meet you as soon as possible. They don't want you to correspond or plan meetings with other women, and try to persuade you "she is the one and the only". They will try to persuade you to use their help for renting an apartment, pointing out on how much you can save comparing to staying at hotel (never offer to stay over at her apartment though). May be she will request your help in paying for emails too, though it's not mandatory. But what is important: the question of money usually will be raised by the woman herself before the meeting. A gold digger will answer your personal questions, and give you her details, but all the time during your pre-meeting correspondence you may already have a feeling that she is not interested in you as a person. The main thing she is interested in is the meeting. Her letters are also very sweet, and tell you many affectionate things every time, calling you sweet affectionate names. (It is not in Russian culture to call each other dozens affectionate names, so letters from sincere women usually are much more reserved.) During the personal meeting a gold digger will try to make you spend money. This includes eating out at expensive restaurants (here she does not think about saving your money); expensive entertainment like casino (not movies); she will ask for gifts, may be in the form of "spontaneous" falling in love with an expensive item in a shop (if you analyze the situation, you will see that she purposefully brought you to this shop), etc, etc. Also, gold diggers are very confident in what they are doing and what they want. If you want to do something in a way different from hers, she will get irritated and angry, actually, she gets irritated with you quite often trying not to show it. Irritation/angriness, often because of minor things, is one of the most obvious warning signs. She is not spending all her time with you - she is either too busy at work and can't get out, or there is another reason. She knows exactly what you two must do next - invite her to your country through a tour (she will buy it herself, you just need to leave her money or send it later), pay officials to finalize her divorce quickly (you need to supply the necessary amount for the bribe), quit her job to concentrate on making her papers ready (you supply her monthly income), pay her debts (several hundreds/thousands dollars - she got into it when her mother was very sick last year), pay the father of her child to sign the papers to let him out of the country, etc, etc - and all this needs money. While an honest woman that truly likes you will sincerely try to save your money - yes, when she meets you in person, she already wants to protect you. It may start with her offer to make a personal invitation for you (she does not need lots of money for that - 10-20 dollars) and stay at her apartment during your visit. When you are in Russia, she will try to eliminate unnecessary expenses, and negotiate the prices herself (if they see you are a foreigner, the price will be higher). She will suggest you to ride a bus if it's not far (because taxi is too expensive); she will show you cheap and good places to eat (like a student cafe); she will rather opt for places that are quiet and where you can talk than places with lots of people. She will proudly introduce you to her family and friends (a gold digger never will; well, probably to her mother who knows about her "business"). She will not ask you for gifts, and will be eternally happy if you buy her a bunch of flowers on the street corner. In a restaurant she won't order the most expensive dishes either. She usually feels insecure, and at the same time happy and excited. She will usually happily accept your way of doing things, and often does not know what she wants, even if you ask. She will spend all her time with you, and even if she needs to go to work, you are invited to fetch her after work at her office door. She is waiting for you to make the next move, and suggest the way you two should proceed. She usually does not know much about the process of fiancee visa or if she needs permission from the father of her child to leave the country (BTW, in Russia permission from the father is not necessary since 2000; in Ukraine and Belarus it is still mandatory). If you offer to leave her some money for expenses, she will be a bit embarrassed but will take them; if you don't offer money yourself, she won't ask. But there is also one more way to check if the woman is sincerely interested in you or just faking her interest, which is always 100% correct: body language. It cannot lie. It does not work from the conscious, so it is impossible to fake. We all are just people - humans, or Homo sapiens. It means we all respond in the same way to the same basic physical stimulus. When we are happy, we smile. When we are in pain, we cry. When we touch something hot, we quickly draw back our hands. No cultural difference could change those natural responses to external stimuli. The body language is the international language of all nations. It is so easy to see if the woman really likes you; I cannot believe so many men fail to read the obvious signs! Watch her when you occasionally touch her: does she move closer (she likes you) or does she move away (she does not like you)? Does she smile at you when you catch her sight (she likes you) or does she look away (she does not like you)? When you lean towards her, does she instantly reciprocate (she likes you) or does she move back or crosses her hands or legs (she does not like you)? Does not matter what her body language says, do not fool yourself: if she fakes her interest, nothing good will come out of it. She might be embarrassed to say she does not like you, or afraid you will feel hurt, and leaves the explanations for later, when you are already at home and she does not need to do it in person, or she is faking her interest in you with some vicious intent - no matter what, if she does not really like you, don't marry her! I cannot emphasize it too much: DO NOT GET INVOLVED WITH ANYBODY WHO FAKES HER INTEREST IN YOU! No matter how much do YOU like her. You WILL get hurt. Only marry a woman who is genuinely attracted to you, and confirms it by her body language. Period. So you see, in the case of gold diggers vs. sincere women, there are quite different behavior patterns, which start from early stages. You can only fall into the trap if you don't want to notice danger signs, and tend to misinterpret them. This is why it's important for you to initially correspond with a few women, so you can compare. Do the checks on preparation stage, to minimize the possible damage and avoid disappointment. There are many simple, no-hussle ways you can do it. The gold digger will usually give you her phone number - use it wisely. Phone your lady at a different time of the day to see if she is really staying there. Gold diggers usually do not read your letters, and their corresponding with many potential victims simultaneously does not let them remember all circumstances of your life. Cleverly mention some particulars in a phone conversation, and see if she remembers them. If she does not, then it's one of the two: she has too many correspondents, or you are talking to a different person than you are writing to. Listen to her voice. Is she excited and happy to hear you? Is it boring for her? Never hesitate to ask a straightforward question if have a strange feeling, and listen to explanations. Phone and say: "Guess who?" - this is a real fun, and the true test, especially if she informed you that "you are The Only Man in her life". It's not bad to know her work number, and be able to talk to her - but please remember, she does not inform all her colleagues and the boss that she is looking for a husband abroad. If possible, have a Russian speaking friend or translator doing that. Phone her home at her work time - where is she? If she is at home... this is a bad sign. Check the phone code of the city - many gold diggers give their mobile phone numbers as "work" numbers. If it's not a stationary phone, the code is different (not always: there are mobile phone companies that supply city numbers). It is easy to write sweet letters but it's not that easy to pretend on the phone - listen to the voice not the words. And don't try to interpret every doubt in her favor. You do not know her. Checking on her is the right thing to do. There is nothing wrong with it! The other instrumental tool may be writing to the same woman under a different name, better from a guy who is completely the opposite to what you are, and what she is (supposedly) looking for. This can be used against both remote scammers and gold diggers. If the letters you receive in response are the same (she writes how yesterday she was visiting a friend in her second letter, and the same she is writing to *another guy* two weeks later), then you know what's going on. Do not limit yourself by 1-2 letters - you know, they are prewritten; but write 3-5. If she says she is in love with you (which you know is a danger sign), definitely do it. If she does not say about love and that you are the one-and-only, she might be still shopping around, so it does not mean she is scamming you if she answers somebody else. This is why the person who wrote her must be "a wrong one". Use another computer or ask a friend to write to her, as scammers may be checking IP addresses and will see if you write from the same computer. If "she" wrote to you first, send your response to the address that was indicated in her first message (before changing her email address). If you wrote her in response to her listing, check if it is still available on the site. If you just hastily send a letter without checking the current situation, you can give yourself away. If you have eliminated remote scammers, and decided to meet your One-And-Only, think about a plain background check. Doing it with all the correspondents may become a very costly exercise, but you can afford it once. Background checks in Russia, Ukraine and Belarus you can find here. And remember: whatever spice a scammer can be, it will always end in as a money matter. No money - no scam. On a brighter note. Men who read the Guide said to me that the first their impression was "Hmmm, seems like finding a Russian wife is the hell of a task! Shouldn't I rather forget about this idea..." Well, this is not that difficult as it could seem to be. Fist of all, as I said, buying addresses from specialized agencies actually saves your money in comparison to using personals sites. Personals charge you month after month, and specialized agencies usually have once-off fees. The price for services of a specialized agency can seem expensive but if you make it for a month of the service backgrounds, it will be usually cheaper than the prices of large Internet personals. postal address and phone number of the women straight away, and do not have to ask for them. All you need - just check them out. Personals do not supply addresses and never verify any details. (Honest specialized agencies never publish ads without checking the legitimacy of the application.) Third, specialized agencies do screen their profiles and verify addresses while personals don't care about the content of the ads. I know many owners of specialized dating sites visit Black List often and check up their databases to keep them clean. (I am here in a better position because I read all scam complains before we even publish them.) For example, 3-month subscription to the Weekly Ladies Catalog (http://www.womenrussia.com/photo-catalog.htm) offered by Russian Brides Cyber Guide which provides you with access woman does exist, but she knows nothing about you, and most likely, has distinctive requirements to her future partner that you don't even fit (very often agencies don't list any requirements to a future partner). The good news: it is possible to locate a woman knowing her full name, place of residence and birth date. Any city in Russia has informational service ("Gorspravka") that can give the street address of any resident if you have those data. and CIS: U.S. Embassy in Moscow, Russia Bolshoy Deviatinsky Pereulok No. 8 Moscow 121099, Russian Federation - PSC-77, APO AE 09721 Tel: +7 (095) 728-5000, fax: 728-5090 (Moscow is 8 hours ahead of Washington) Consular e-mail (for questions regarding visas and other consular services): email@example.com Fraud Prevention Manager: Kim Marie Sonn; Tel: 7 (095) 728-5000; Fax: 7 (095) 728-5256 E-mail: firstname.lastname@example.org The U.S. Consulate General in St. Petersburg, Russia Ulitsa Furshtadskaya, 15, St. Petersburg 191028 Russia � PSC 78, Box L, APO AE 09723 Tel: +7 (812) 331-2600, fax: 331-2852 (Saint Petersburg is 8 hours ahead of Washington) After hours emergencies: 331-2888 E-mail: email@example.com Site: http://www.stpetersburg-usconsulate.ru The U.S. Consulate General in Vladivostok, Russia Ulitsa Pushkinskaya 32, Vladivostok 690001 Tel: +7 (4232) 30-00-70 (international phone: +7-501 (4232) 30-00-70) Fax: +7 (4232) 49-93-72 (international fax: +7-501 (4232) 49-93-72) (Vladivostok is 15 hours ahead of Washington) Site: http://vladivostok.usconsulate.gov/ The U.S. Consulate General in Yekaterinburg, Russia Ulitsa Gogolya 15A, 4th floor Yekaterinburg 620151, Russia Tel: +7 (3432) 79-30-01, 56-46-19, 56-46-91 Emergency contact numbers: In Russia: 8-902-84-16653 From U.S.: 011-7-092-16653 (Yekaterinburg is 10 hours ahead of Washington) Email: firstname.lastname@example.org Site: http://www.uscgyekat.ur.ru/ American Embassy in Kiev, Ukraine 10, Yuriya Kotsiubynskoho Street, 01901, Kiev, Ukraine Phone: Country Code: +380 City Code: 44 Telephone: 490 4000 Fax: 490-4085 Email (visa contacts): email@example.com Site: http://usinfo.usemb.kiev.ua/visa_faq_eng.html Fraud Prevention Manager: Oleg M. Polozov; Phone: 380 44 490-4238 Email: to 1,000+ profiles of available Russian women (all with bios, photos and addresses) is only $95. For 3 months you will have access to 50-130 new screened profiles EVERY WEEK. And you have all contact details of the women straight away, no need to ask for them - so all you need to do, just make sure you have the direct contact with the woman and do not forget to use all channels of personal contact (email PLUS regular mail and phone) to make her feel you are for real and really interested in her. What more, we check the submitted addresses to make sure they do exist, so there is not a lot left, is it? This is what I mean by saying that specialized agencies save your time and money. What does it mean for YOU? It means that you won't be asked for money just because the owners took care about it before you get in contact with their women. The quality of your correspondence will quickly show you if it is for real. If she only says "sweet nothing's" and is all The aim of a scammer is to develop trust, and they are VERY, VERY GOOD at it. You feel checking on her will be an indecent deed. I know a case where a guy was talking to "her" on the phone twice a week (of course, it was one of those "pay as you go" cell phones without a contract), and it was a very caring and kind person on the other side. Scammers are very clever and they feel nothing towards you. Trust no one. You can trust me though AND the people I recommend. Everyone asking for money to come and visit you (without you offering that first) must be avoided. Period. Don't let anybody lead you into such a situation; clear up everything from the beginning - you don't believe in love via the Internet, you are not sending money to anybody, you plan to visit her country soon and you can meet in person, and stick to it. They will not spend their time on you, again, scammers are clever and they are not idiots - why spend time in a vain when there are so many men who have no idea about scams and are easy prey. I believe that if you are truly looking for a lifetime partnership and marriage, going to the lady's country to meet her in person is an honorable intention and a must. If you are just entertaining around and it is not serious for you, and money is not a problem, then go ahead - it is a type of Russian roulette where 7 of the 8 bullets are in the gun - lots of fun and excitement - if you enjoy such things! Last advice. If after all I said above you still want to send money to the person you never met (Mmmm... When was the last time you've seen your psychologist?), ask her for her father's name (patronymic name, or "otchestvo" - all Russian, Belarus and Ukrainian people use it in their documents) and her passport number. For the purpose of police investigation, patronymic name is of great help: there can be 300 people in her city having the same name and surname, and only 1 or 2 of them having the same patronymic name as her. Both Western Union and Money Gram have the option of test question: the question should be: "Your passport number", and the answer will be the number she gave you. She says her town is closed to foreigners and I will not be able to visit her in her home town. Yes, there are still some towns that are closed for foreigners. But it does not matter: there is ALWAYS a bigger city close by (not further than 100 km) that you can meet her in. Find a map of Russia and try to figure out where it is yourself. I know recently scammers use this tactic to confuse men. I actually never heard about any real woman for whom living in a "closed" city would be a problem. They know they will need to meet a guy in a city nearby, and usually have friends or family there that she can stay with during your meeting. So if your contact says you will not be able to visit her at her home city because foreigners are not allowed there, most likely it is a scam. The remedy - ask her what is the closest big city that is open for foreigners, and request her to meet you there. If she agrees, you will have to make a background check on her before booking tickets. I know only scammers who voiced being unable to meet because of living in a "closed" town. So you need to make sure she is real before spending money on tickets. Background checks can be found here. I am corresponding with a woman that I met through one of the online personals sites where anyone can place a free ad. She seems to be very "real" and our relationship is developing very well. You say those sites are not reliable, but I don't think my lady is a scammer. Question #1: Who wrote to whom? If it was her who wrote to you, most likely IT IS A SCAM! Remedy: Ask her how she gained premium membership to the site which requires payment. Play dumb and say if you would want to answer ads, you would need to pay. Ask her if she has a credit card. Listen carefully to the explanations! If she says it was her friend or acquaintance that paid for her membership, request the contact details (phone) of the person. If the p
erson has a credit card, it is impossible she does not have a phone! Only top income people have credit cards in Russia/Ukraine, so they will have a phone at home. If it is her friend in a foreign country who got married to somebody, also ask for her phone number and also ask to talk to her friend's husband. It is possible her married friend wants to help her to find somebody abroad. In this case you just got lucky! It is true that many women in Russia become interested in marrying a foreigner after their friends found somebody abroad. Many my friends gave me their data and now seek husbands abroad seeing how happy I am. Also send email to the friend who paid for her membership and check the IP numbers in the return email. You can learn how to trace emails here. If it was you who answered her ad on the personals site, then she is likely to be real. Get her postal address and phone number, and use all instructions from above: clear up everything from the beginning - you don't believe in love via the Internet, you are not sending money to anybody, you plan to visit her country soon and you can meet in person, and stick to it. If your contact is good and real, she will be happy to see that you are serious about meeting her and it will only help you to win her heart! Gold diggers OK, allmilk and honey, then you know something's wrong. Because honest Russian women do not allow strangers too close. Until she has a chance to really get to know you and your soul, she will not be very affectionate in her letters. But she will try to learn about you, and let you learn about her. I translate a lot of correspondence of my clients from Russian to English, and those women write such beautiful letters. But there is nothing "sweet" about them. You understand what I mean? Those letters are deep, intellectual, soulful and heartfelt but they are not written for anybody, only for the man she is writing to, and cannot be sent to somebody else because they discuss things that are only applicable to YOU. She cannot send it to Bob or John after replacing your name with his. I encourage you to try to get to know real Russian women. For there are great rewards to be found. The experience of getting to know real Russian women is rewarding on its own. Unconditional acceptance and selfless love are not the things we see often in the (adult) western relationships between people. As one of my clients noticed:Now that I have experience with Russian ladies, I do not think I could ever be with an American!!!! (Travis Perkins, USA) In any area of life, there are good people and there are bad ones. Good things in life have their price. But they are well worth it! If you have not found advice for your particular situation, please do not hesitate to contact me. Send your request to firstname.lastname@example.org. I will answer it in priority order. Please read the whole "troubleshooting" section before sending such request; most likely, there is an answer to your situation.n the chance to introduce some of our services that proved to be effective and of good value. Scam-free search - GUARANTEED! "Individual Search" is a matchmaking service, which lets you find exactly the type of woman you are looking for. You want to find a younger, beautiful and educated wife but find the whole process frustrating? Let professionals to do the job for you. Click here to learn more about the Individual Search service JUST RELEASED! New E-book by Elena Petrova: "How To Find And Marry A Girl Like Me" The Perfect Sequel to the "Anti-Scam Guide"! Comment from a reader: "Dear Elena, I have just read your ebook, "How to find and marry . . . ", and enjoyed it. I read your book about scammers before my trip to Ukraine, and now I wish I had also read this one! I spent 10 days in Ukraine, and learned some of the things you wrote about for myself, the hard way! Having read your book on scammers, I was wary of women wanting gifts, and I still don't entirely understand this part of the culture. Fortunately, the woman I met in Ukraine is, I think, a decent and understanding woman, and tried to explain things to me. My camera died while I was there, and she thought it
would be a good idea to buy a new digital camera, which I could use while there, and then leave with her to have when I am gone. Her request raised my suspicions a little, and I believe I conveyed this with body language. I should have simply said, "No, I don't want to buy it," as you suggest in your book. Instead, we had a significant conflict over this. Not because I wouldn't buy her the camera, but because she perceived me as being "greedy" (which I only later came to understand means "stingy" to her!). We have had some other misunderstandings which could have been avoided by a prior reading of your book. Fortunately, she is very understanding, and I have been able to explain to her that we have cultural differences that I am trying to learn. Also, her mummy loves me very much and understands some of these things, and has helped me (us) out. Your discussion of sexual expectations is very much appreciated. Of course, every man wants to have sex, but that is not what I mean. I want sex to be in accordance with what she expects, and comfortable for her. So this was something I wondered about quite a bit, but it is not something that is easy to get good information on! Your straightforward explanation was most useful. Kevin Andrews (USA) Click here to find out more about his new break-through book! Click here to start Guide, 1999-2007. All rights reserved. No portion of this site may be reproduced without written permission from the author
PLEASE REPORT SCAMS! So, how do scammers operate? Unlike Nigerian scammers, Russian scammers don't work from the Internet cafes. Nigerian scammers mostly rely on chats and IMs, for that purpose an Internet cafe would perfectly do, but Russian scammers mostly operate through e-mail. The Internet cafes with their web-based mail are not appropriate to handle that volume of e-mail correspondence. To handle the load they need a special e-mailing software, like The Bat!, which cannot be installed in a cafe. They usually rent an apartment and equip it with computers, something like telemarketers office. They work in groups, usually 5-6 gals or guys per group. The groups work in this "office" in 3 shifts. The duties of the office group is to place profiles and handle correspondence. Sometimes they also make phone calls from the office. Those are usually webcalls, which cannot be traced. Every day each scammer sends out about 300 letters. The scambaiters with experience are often able to recognize these groups. Each group has its own "pattern" of behavior, for example: the "writer" of one group usually repeats the words, like "that that", "to to" etc.. The funny part is, when this person speaks on the phone she also repeats the words! Probably reads the text from a paper. In another group, they like to name their computers like "Hell", "Demon", "Immortal", etc.. (if you look at their e-mail headers, you can see helo=hell, helo=demon, etc..) One group, if you accuse them of scamming, starts cursing you and becomes very aggressive. Another group is more calm and patient. Also, different groups may use different versions of The Bat! In some groups work mostly guys, sometimes they leave Russian words untranslated and those words are of male gender. The girls portrayed on the pictures are usually not the ones who work in the office and write you letters. The girls on the pictures may live in Kazan, Cheboksary, Kirov, etc... they also pick up money Western Union in those cities, while the offices with computers and "staff writers" are in Yoshkar Ola, Mari El. Each girl on the pictures is "worked" by 5-6 scammers in the office and all of them get paid about 10-15% of the total scam income. The rest goes to the boss. They also may do pictures on request, like with the personalized signs. Scammers also offer their services to other scammers and newbies, those are scammers-"wholesalers". Scamming is a big industry in Mari El! If you are a scammer, you may occasionally get "offers" on your e-mail from backgroundsscammers-"wholesalers", just like we get Viagra and cheap-loan-consolidation spam. Here are some example of such "offers", so you get an idea how bad it is (note: the originals are sent in Russian, below is my translation for you.) Hello! We offer everything for successful scammers work. If you wish to make more money, or if you are a beginner, than you need our services. 1) Sets of the real women's photos, not listed on any scamlists yet, also the ability to make personalized photos on you request. One photo set - $25-80. 2) Sets of the letter templates, plus the inserts on different topics, to personalize letters. One set of templates + inserts - $55-120 3) stolen credit cards numbers and stolen paypal accounts to pay on the dating sites. 1 credit card - $2, 1
paypal account - $15-30 4) services in sending spam to men, up to 1MB, sent to your list of e-mail address. 1 000 000 of e-mails - $150 5) hacking (braking into) any dating service with the purpose of stealing their database. Price should be discussed personally with Asya. 6) calling American men on the phone. Price should be discussed. 7) anonymous pickup money via Western Union or MoneyGram. Price - 15% from the sum. 8) opening of the overseas bank accounts for a direct deposit of money by men. You will get a credit card with a direct access to that account. Price - $500 9) database of e-mail addresses that was stolen from singlesnet.com and other dating sites. Price - 5000 e-mails is $40 Everything else you needs can be discussed, we work fast and guarantee our quality, have samples of our work to show you. Our contact e-mail email@example.com, ICQ number 235-718-441 P.S. Don't worry, we got your email from stop-scammers and agencyscams websites. Or another crap ("XXX" are put here for privacy): Hello! We would like to offer you the databases of e-mails stolen from the popular dating sites (Yahoo personals, match.com, etc..). The databases are sorted by countries, cities, genders and ages. Mainly, men from USA, UK, Canada and Australia. (75% men and 25% women). 93% of e-mails are still active, the databases where collected during 11.1.2005. - 1.10.2006. All data is stored in such format: Name: Adrian Surname: XXXX Age: 34 Country: UK State: Branston City: Lincoln E-mail: XXX@yahoo.co.uk YahooID: XXX Marital status: single Kids: no tel: 44-152-XXX-XXX 44-771-XXX-XXX Name: Michael Surname: PXXX Age: 44 Country: USA State: Oregon City: Eugene E-mail: XXX@yahoo.com YahooID: XXX Marital status: divorced Kids: yes tel: 1-541-XXX-XXX Knowing Yahoo ID, you can see the full info about this person and his photo. We also offer the databases of males and females separately. More detailed info you can get after contacting us at e-mail: firstname.lastname@example.org, ICQ support 321-436-014. We will be glad to answer your questions. P. S. Attached is the file as an example of our databases. Yet, another crap, even worse: Hello, I am the owner of a site which sells flowers and gifts, with shipping to Russia. I offer: 1) Your American buys you gifts through my online store, I don't send the gifts anywhere and we split the money. I will send you Western Union 40% from the total price of gifts that they buy from me. My store accepts credit cards, which is very important. 2) I will tell your American that the gifts were successfully delivered, which will convince him that you are real. This could be very profitable co-operation, there are many rich Americans who can send you gifts on many hundreds of dollars, but even regular ones will have to pay at least $50-90. If a person buys gifts on $1300, yours will be $600, plus verification that you exist. The prause is email@example.com. 2) Another place to report Russian scammers is MVD of Russia, aka MOI (Ministry of the Interior of Russia). This is like the headquarters of Russian Police: http://eng.mvdrf.ru/ Send your message through "Public Reception" center. They have a special so-called department "K" dedicated to fight cybercrime. Remember, your report to above 2 places should be brief, clear, generates from the same source: Mari El. There is also a small scam source in Kazan, but it's really small. Not to be confused with all those thousands of profiles that say they are from "Kazan"!! They are actually from Mari El, but just saying they are from Kazan. Another small source is in Lugansk, but those registrations are mostly coming from the same IP, it's probably some Internet cafe in Lugansk. Those are nothing compared to Mari El, a drop in the ocean! Most of the scam comes from Mari El and their accomplices in the United States, and only tiny percentage from Kazan and Lugansk. In most cases you can tell that the girl is a scammer just by looking at her profile. Tip 1. Most scammy profiles start with words "I the sociable girl", "I the cheerful girl", or whatever, with "am" omitted. Or, if it says "To me of 25 years", or whatever age, but that weird phrase "to me of xx years" or "me of xx years". Yes, it is a scam!!! Believe my experience, each and every profile that started with this particular cliche and had this grammar mistake, later turned out to be a scam. Don't ask me why they are putting this in their profiles!!! Stupid, perhaps?? Or maybe they use some absolutely weird translator that translates the phrase lik
e that? Or maybe they have some "profile writer" in their "staff" who writes it? I have no idea! There is nothing wrong with making mistakes when it is not your native language. After all, English is not my native language too, and as you see I make mistakes too. But to start each and every profile with the same cliche, and with the same grammar mistake is really dumb! It's like putting a signature "I am a scammer". But overall, while dealing with Russian scam, I come to the conclusion that scammers are not very smart people. That'sdocumentary proven and straight to the point. From that depends if they will consider it. It should contain your full name and contact information. ALWAYS include the open e-mail headers of scammer's letters! This is the only way they can trace where the e-mails originate from and possibly catch the scammers. If you don't know how to do it, LEARN before you send your report. You can also send report to the scammer's embassy in your country, your embassy in scammer's country, to Western Union, to MoneyGram. But honestly, I personally doubt the effectiveness of such reports. I never heard of these reports making any difference. I think any crime (and scam is a crime!) should be reported to the law enforcement offices which deal with criminals (the police, FBI, FSB, MVD, etc...) Useful resources Please note, this is NOT a link exchange page. Webmasters, please don't ask me to place your links here. Below are the links to the sites I personally like, find useful, also pages of my friends, helpers, scambaiters and other good stuff that I recommend. First, the scamlists. There are manyctice shows that Americans are always willing to buy gifts. You can invent birthdays, yours, your Moms, your Grandmas. To encourage them to buy from me, here are the examples: a) I saw the watch that I always dreamed of on xxx.com, by the way my Birthday is coming. b) I tried to order you flowers on xxx.com, but unfortunately they only deliver to Russia. They have so many beautiful flowers, I love flowers so much! c) I saw a teddy bear, wanted to order it for you from xxx.com, but they don't ship to the US, only ship to Russia. Such a beautiful teddy bear, I always wanted to have one. d) My Mom's birthday is coming, I am going to give her chocolates, and if you wish you can buy her the watch on xxx.com, she always dreamed to have such watch. They ship to Russia and will deliver it right to our door. My Mom will be so glad! The prices of my gifts: 39$ - 129$ (flowers) 69$ - 139$ (watch) Champaign - from 20$ toys - from 30$ Your e-mail was taken form agencyscams.com Disgusted?!! Me too!! Now tell me they are not plain thieves! Besides, this also answers your question: "where the hell did she get my e-mail addy from??" When out of the blue you get an e-mail from a pretty Russian girl with "To me of xxx years", now you know where do those criminals get e-mail addresses of men. Also, since the stolen credit cards they use to pay on the dating services are of American folks, that pretty much explains why do they say in their profiles they are from the US: so the administrators of those sites don't suspect fraud right away! If you get contacted on a dating service by a pretty girl, whose profile says she is from the US, but her message to you says "Me called Olga, I live in Cheboksary, to me of 25 years", you know why her profile says she is from the US instead of Russia
Russians scammers database
to: *** Your local police station. They may also advice you what to do and where to report further. *** FBI. They have a special Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3) http://www.ic3.gov/ *** Nigerian scams you can also report to a special organization created in Nigeria to fight 419 and other financial cybercrime, EFCC: The Economic and Financial Crimes Commission http://www.efccnigeria.org *** Russian scams you can (and should!) report to the following 2 places: 1) FSB, aka FSS (Federal Security Service). This organization is similar to FBI in Russia. http://www.fsb.ru/contact/contact.html Please note, this website is in Russian. You can use online translator, for example http://freetranslation.paralink.com/ to translate the page (recommended). The e-mail you can different scamlists on the web, no need to name them all, just do a Google search. I occasionally visit them all, usually after googling some name or e-mail, but the ones I personally like, re-visit and use the most are: *** Dotsilver. This is my favorite. This list is updated daily with bunch of new scammers that they kick out of dotsilver network sites. Contains both Russian and Nigerian scammers, males and females, has a search option. This is not your typical list with the piles of scam letters, but since it is maintained by my colleagues, dating webmasters, I have an idea how this list is built, and believe me, the value of such lists is very high, since they list the fresh scammers "on the fly", before they even get a chance to scam somebody. A MUST use list. *** Stop-scammers. Though this list mostly specializes on Russian scams, they also list Nigerian female scammers. Unfortunately, full access to this list is not free, you gotta be a paid member, but even if you are not a paid member you can still browse it for free. And since I know what a hard and ungrateful work is it to maintain the scamlists, I don't blame them for charging money. *** Agencyscams. This site has a lot of useful information and articles. Jim's section that I am linking to, "If a Russian woman asks for money it's a scam" is something that everybody should print out, stick to their computer monitor and learn by heart. I couldn't say it better! Yahoo Groups: *** Romancescams Group. I said a lot about this group throughout my site. This awesome group was the first one created to fight the Nigerian romance scams. They did a lot, and continue doing, to educate people, help victims, provide everybody with important information and support, as well as get attention of media to this huge problem. You gotta join this group if you are either a Nigerian scam victim, or suspect you may be a victim, or think somebody may be trying to scam you. *** Anti-scammers Group. The second group created to fight romance scams, very open-minded and informational. This group I highly recommend to men and scambaiters. *** Internet Victim Resource Center. This is a new group, dedicated to providing counseling and assistance to those who have been victims of Internet fraud, primarily Romance Scams. This group is for after the healing and dedicated to empowering victims to get their lives back as well as finding financial, legal and psychological support. Sites about scams and scammers: *** The US Embassy in Moscow. Some useful info about Russian scams from the US Embassy: how to check if the visa is real, and most importantly debunking the common myth about "travel money", "pocket money" "airplane money" and other BS that scammers invented. *** 419eater. A scambaiter paradise! I love this site. It's hilarious (check their trophies section), and at the same time educational, this should be your first stop if you decide to jump into an exciting world of scambaiting and scambacking. *** Xavier's site about Russian scammer Elena Vasileva. This site has much more than just info about Elena, nicely put together and very informational. *** Stepan's blog about Russian scammer Oksana Belousova, and some others, has a forum. *** Noscamz4me about Nigerian scammer Collins Davis. Hopefully you will find these recourses uesful.
So, how do you detect scam? Of course you can just wait and see if she asks you for money. But you probably don't want to get to the point when she actually starts asking for money, right? You would be wasting your time, and maybe even getting attached to that person, making plans, just to discover later that she is a freakin scammer. We don't want any drama here! You want to know right away if it's a scam. So, here it goes: Russian scam is fairly easy to detect by IP address. Most of the Russian scam why probably they cannot make it out of poverty in their own country, backgrounds and stick to scams: the only thing they are good at. Anyway, whenever you see that, it's a scam. You don't even have to check IPs, emails and photos, really! Just run away from it! BTW, you wanted a database with photos? Here is the PERFECT one for you: Google! Just enter in quotes: "I the sociable girl", or "I the cheerful girl", or "I the nice girl", or any combination of those and here you go. Everything returned is a prefect scam database. I bet most of it will be either